Forever Yours
by Yui Miyamoto
Summary: [In progress - chapter 16 done] What happens when you grow up...but the one you love will always stay the same?
1. Prologue Kaerimichi e

Disclaimer: Chobits is by Clamp.  
  
Why can't things stay the same?  
Why must they change?  
Friends come and go,  
But through it all,  
  
I thought I'd always be with you.  
  
Always,  
Without a doubt.  
  
Without a single doubt  
In my mind...  
  
  
Forever Yours  
By Miyamoto Yui  
  
Prologue - Kaerimichi e... (On the way home...)  
  
It was a long day.  
Today, I had decided to stay home and research things on the internet. Yuzuki instead went alone to the market.  
The clock was ticking away before me.  
  
I smiled to myself. It was something that she had picked out.   
It looked like those old Angelic Layer eggs, but one of the old prototypes would walk out and say something like, "Shichi ji han desu!"  
  
Right now, it was Hikaru that came out and went back into the egg on the wall.  
  
I had wondered why Yuzuki liked such a strange thing. She never seemed the type because she never went for that sort of thing. I sighed.   
"Oh well," I said to myself. "Whatever makes her happy."  
  
That was the only time she ever went up to me and asked me for something...  
  
Standing in front of a store when I was twelve, she pointed at the egg curiously.  
"What is that?" she asked.   
"Ohaiyo gozaimasu." Something from the egg said this as they bowed and went back in.   
Yuzuki blinked her eyes.  
I raised an eyebrow at such a contraption. "Strange," I commented.  
Then, I remembered where I had seen that blue visor before: Wizard.  
  
Oujirou-san's Wizard.  
I shook my head in disbelief.   
"Ah," I had said in amusement.  
  
A tiny voice commented, "I like it."   
I glanced at Yuzuki and found her blinking at me with no way of fidgeting around. She didn't know how to.  
But I knew. When she folded her hands that way, I knew she liked it.  
Only, this time, she pointed her head down immediately as a response to my glance.  
  
That was when I knew that she REALLY liked it.  
She had never given that type of response before.   
  
So, what could I do?  
  
Yuzuki calmly looked up and shook her head slowly. "I'm sorry, Minoru-sama. I didn't mean to. I don't know why I did that."  
Bowing, she added, "Please don't trouble yourself. Please excuse my behavior."  
  
"Then it's decided," I said as I took her hand to go inside the store, "We'll get one for home then."  
  
"You don't need a clock, Minoru-sama," she tried to reason. "You have-"  
  
"But you don't have one," I firmly said as I smiled solemnly.  
  
Looking at the attendant, I said, "Can I have that please? And I want it custom-made with all the original angelic layer dolls."  
  
"Hai," the girl said. "It will be ready for you within two days."  
  
I nodded and that was that.  
We came back, got it, and brought it home.  
  
Yuzuki kept on blinking at me worriedly and I patted her head. I was already the same height as her, so I just calmed her down this way.   
  
When she hung it in my office, she was honestly smiling and I felt really light inside as she did that.   
  
"Happy Birthday, Yuzuki." I greeted.  
  
"Oh..." She smiled shyly. "You...remembered."  
  
"Of course. I made you." I said matter-of-factly.  
  
"But I do not see too many other owners giving their persocoms presents, Minoru-sama," she innocently commented.  
  
"You're not a persocom to me," I said, a bit annoyed.  
  
Giving her a sharp look, I walked up to her and caught her shoulders. Looking straight into her eyes, I said, "You're my Yuzuki."  
  
She nodded. "Hai, Minoru-sama."  
  
But...could you really understand what I was saying to you, Yuzuki? Do you really comprehend that I touch you differently than anyone else?  
  
And that you touch me just as deeply.   
  
  
Lost in my thoughts, I then heard the door.  
Click.   
"Tadaimasu, Minoru-sama," Yuzuki greeted as she opened the door.  
  
Bowing her head, she closed the door behind her slowly.  
  
But I looked at her strangely. And I knew immediately that something was wrong.  
  
I had made this girl...  
I knew her more than the blood that flowed through my own veins...  
  
As I looked at her, the worried expression she wore was confused in full force. She folded her hands.  
And from the way her fingers intertwined within one another, she had to ask a question.  
  
An important one.  
  
"I was at the market today..." she started to say.  
  
I nodded my head while still looking at her. "Yes."  
  
She looked up to me, "I'm sorry I'm late."  
  
I sighed in relief, "Is that all? I thought something happened!"  
Yuzuki was such a worrywart that she would think that I would get mad at her for not being on time.  
I did once, but that was because she was gone for quite a long time.  
  
Yuzuki's eyes looked up to mine sorrowfully. "I was late because there was a reason."  
  
"I'm pretty sure it was a good one." I got up and patted her shoulders. "Cheer up. Whatever it was, it's okay, right? You would never be late on purpose."  
  
"It was my fault."  
  
My face's expression became confused. And then I let her go. "What happened, Yuzuki?"  
  
I had hoped that I was wrong...  
But I had created this girl  
With my heart and my hands intertwined...  
  
  
"I couldn't find my way home, Minoru-sama."  
  
  
A part of me died at that moment.  
  
  
Tsuzuku...  
--  
  
author's note: I love these two. I plan to get the Yuzuki plushie! Ish so cute!  
But I wanted to do this story because what would happen to Minoru when he grows up with Yuzuki? I'm sure it wouldn't be too easy... 


	2. Chapter 1 wouldn't she?

Disclaimer: Chobits is by the wonderful, yet cruel Clamp.  
  
Forever Yours  
By Miyamoto Yui  
  
Chapter 1 – …wouldn't she?  
  
Hesitantly, I asked her, "What did you say?"  
  
"I couldn't find my way home," she repeated once again to me with her hands holding one another tightly.  
  
The blow was just as harsh.  
I knew I had heard correctly.  
  
I took her hands and held them gently. If I didn't, I feared that she wouldn't know that she was damaging her skin by all the squeezing.  
  
I was in a panic, but I wouldn't show her. That's how it always was.  
I just couldn't be anything but calm.  
It was scary even to myself.  
  
I took her to the couch and sat her down.  
  
Pushing her hair over her ear, I connected her to the laptop that I had recently purchased.  
  
Bowing her head, she was in standby mode. Then, I looked over her data.  
Everything seemed to be intact.  
  
I sighed.  
She was custom-made…  
  
If anything happened to her, what would she do? She would have to come to me naturally.  
But I had feared the day, as with any human and their persocom, the day that I couldn't repair Yuzuki.  
  
No matter how much I studied or 'fixed' her, I always tried to deny that there would be a day that I couldn't do anything.  
That I would just look at her one day and watch her deteriorate before my very eyes.  
  
I shook my head as tears began to come to my eyes. I refused to let them fall though.  
I was determined.  
  
Only Yuzuki could make me love her so much that I could react so extremely.  
  
I then squinted my eyes at the screen. "What's this?"  
  
The computer screen was blinking.  
  
"Temporary storage. New information," I read aloud as I clicked on it.  
  
"Password," the familiar message came on.  
  
What question had Yuzuki wanted to ask me before she told me she was late?  
  
"Paradise dream," I said in English.  
  
Confirmed.  
  
Then, it replayed a video…  
  
* Bustle, bustle. *  
  
I must get all that is on the grocery list. The best route would be this way.  
  
* A mental map with a red arrow appears to show Yuzuki's route through the market *  
  
* Picks everything from the list and places it into a basket *  
  
* Bump *  
  
"Excuse-never mind," a housewife says.  
  
I bow my head though I know I shouldn't have.   
This is a usual occurrence.  
  
There are women who occasionally do this to comfort themselves. They believe that persocoms are trouble. Especially female ones like myself.  
  
I can't tell Minoru-sama though because he'll get worried.  
  
* Resumes going around and makes purchases *  
  
I must get him his book also.  
Will he be mad that I got him something without asking him?  
  
* Looks around *  
  
Why must people always whisper?  
  
"There is that persocom again. She may be cute, but that boy never wants to have friends because of her," one woman with a ponytail whispers to another.  
  
* Picks up book *  
  
The other one, the one with an old lady's perm, answers back, "He'll grow out of it. Don't worry. Most of them do."  
  
What does this mean? 'To grow out of it'?  
I must ask this later.  
  
* Takes book and looks at another one *  
  
"There will come a time when a newer model will come out," the pony-tailed one whispers while still looking at me even though she tries not to make it seem obvious. "They're made everyday!"  
  
"Boys are always so fickle," the one with the perm replies. "Besides, persocoms can only do so much."  
  
* Decides to take the first book and proceeds to the register of the bookstore *  
  
* Walks out after politely thanking the cashier *   
  
I repeat in my head, "There will come a time when a newer model will come."  
  
No, Minoru-sama said he loved me.  
Even though I don't really understand this concept of love as humans call it, I know the way we are is like the way Chi and her master are.  
I had wanted Minoru-sama to look at me the same way…  
  
To help him in any way…  
  
And then, he had looked at me that way.  
  
No. Minoru-sama wouldn't do that at all.  
  
* Vision goes a bit blurry *  
  
It is happening again.  
  
* Goes on automatic mode *  
  
Back up data accessed.  
Kaerimichi.  
Confirmed.  
  
* Walks towards home *  
  
End of data.  
  
I took a deep breath as I looked at Yuzuki.  
I had looked at your 'heart' without your permission…  
  
But it was for your own good.  
  
Still in standby mode, I placed my slightly shaking hands on Yuzuki's shoulders.  
Her head still bent, I looked at the hair in front of me.  
  
"Yuzuki…I didn't know."   
That's all I could say.  
  
I didn't know how to fix this glitch at the moment.  
But to never know that she went through such discriminations…  
  
At this day and age, people are still so cruel.  
  
And that was just today's data…  
  
"What about before? I want to know. Why didn't you tell me, Yuzuki?"  
I shook my head knowing the answer too well.  
  
I got up, took out the connections and she was out of standby mode.  
  
Standing up, she blinked at me.  
  
I then grabbed her face and looked at her intensely. Searching into her eyes, I wanted to find an answer to anything.  
Even though all was hopeless to ask or find a response to.  
  
After a moment of silence, I finally find my voice.  
  
"I saw," I whispered melancholically.  
  
"You know my question," she said as she folded her hands while looking down  
  
"Look at me please," I pleaded.  
  
She looked at me again.  
  
"I can never grow out of you. That means to be tired of someone or something. But you answered your own question, Yuzuki."  
  
How can I say that there are few in your life that you meet, and when you do, you can't live without them?  
Even if you created them into reality.  
  
You are a part of me, Yuzuki…  
  
"Have I, Minoru-sama?"  
  
I nodded.   
"I love you," I answered without hesitation.  
  
Closing my eyes, I didn't listen to reason.  
  
I kissed her…  
  
For the first time, in sixteen years that I've been alive, I finally had the courage to let myself be hurt by Yuzuki.  
Profusely.  
  
Confused, she looked at me with nothing to say.  
  
I looked at her eyes. And they reflected me back.  
With loneliness, my reflection was watching me back. The frown was still there and had never left.  
  
I looked at Yuzuki.  
  
  
No matter how I would grow older and older…  
  
That height, those eyes, these hands…  
  
Yuzuki would always look like that.  
She would always be the same…  
  
…wouldn't she?  
  
  
Tsuzuku.  
--  
Author's note: AWWWW….dammit…I love them… 


	3. Chapter 2 Wakaru?

Disclaimer: Yui doesn't own Chobits. I just love this pairing to write about them.  
  
Forever yours  
By Miyamoto Yui  
  
Chapter 2 – Wakaru? (Understand?)  
  
"Minoru-sama?" Yuzuki asked as she leaned over to put her hand on my forehead. "Are you all right?"  
  
That same worried expression encompassed her face as she touched her lips with her fingers. Looking from side to side, her programming was failing her now.  
She could have never predicted this situation or its response.  
  
For I myself had been surprised by the sudden rush captured by the moment.  
  
But it didn't feel wrong, even when I knew it was.  
  
"I'm fine, Yuzuki," I said as I finally let her go.  
  
Turning around, I looked at the ground. Gulping, I said, "I'm going to bed now."  
  
I wasn't feeling so well anymore. I had lost my appetite all together now.   
  
As I was walking out of the room, I told her, "Please fix my bed, Yuzuki."  
  
With the shifting of her clothing, I heard her nod her head. Curiously, she grabbed my sleeve with her fingers. If she could tremble, I knew she would have at that moment.  
"Yuzuki?"  
  
Her fingers held onto my sleeve even tighter. "What did you do to me?"  
  
I answered without turning around, "I kissed you."  
  
"I don't understand…" she shook her head. "No matter what I do. No matter how much I'll research. I'll never understand, Minoru-sama."  
  
"Yuzuki…" I sighed as I faced her once more and held her in my arms. As I pushed her head to my chest and patted her head, I kissed her head. "What are you hiding from me?"  
  
Silence.  
  
Letting her go, I said, "We'll find out everything we can tomorrow."  
  
Hesitantly, she nodded, but I could tell that in her eyes, she both knew the answer and not.  
  
When I was changing for bed, there was a knock at the door. Still putting one sleeve on, I replied, "Come in."  
Yuzuki opened the door and held a tray on one hand as she came in. Her eyes widened a bit. "Should I turn around, Minoru-sama?"  
  
I had never let her in while I was dressing…  
  
"No," I replied honestly. "Put the tray down and come here."  
  
Nodding obediently, she came over to me. I pulled her hand as she gave me a look full of child inquisitiveness. Then, I placed her left hand on my bare chest, over my heart.  
"Do you feel that, Yuzuki?"  
  
Slowly, she said, "Yes, I do."  
  
If I explain this literally, you'll understand only the surface meanings. What I've been trying all these years is for you to understand what's beyond that, Yuzuki.  
  
"I kissed you because of this."  
  
"How…how is that possible?" She blinked her eyes at me. "These are two different body-"  
  
I shook my head. "You don't have to understand everything about the world or about humans and their idiosyncrasies."  
  
Then, I put my own hand over where a heart should be on her own body. "You have one also, faulty as my programming was."  
  
Yuzuki shook her head. "No, you did all right, Minoru-sama."  
  
"Then why are you losing your memory, Yuzuki? Why won't you tell me?" I looked at straight in the eye calmly even though I was so angry and frustrated at what I knew was happening.  
  
"There is a certain limit to how long a persocom can be of use, Minoru-sama." She then let go of my hand and took a step back. While looking at the ground, she folded her hands and her eyes tried to find something to focus on.  
  
In the near darkness, I looked at her.  
  
Then, slowly, she lifted her head. "My time is almost up."  
  
"And how long do you have?" I asked feeling myself become numb once more.  
  
"Not too long."  
  
Suddenly, my hands shook violently. My voice rose until I shouted in frustration, "But you're custom-made! Do you know how many prototypes it took to perfect you, Yuzuki!"   
  
I didn't know if I was saying this to her, myself, or for both of our sakes. To keep my sanity intact and her with me.  
  
"Twelve," she answered matter-of-factly.  
  
I knew more than anyone what she was saying, but I didn't want to hear it. I didn't think I'd ever see this day. In the back of my mind, however, I knew the truth lingered there.  
When you like your life, why would you want to change it, right?  
  
I took her shoulders, and stared straight into her eyes. Those blue plates that always reflected me back.  
These eyes of hers always showed me how imperfect of a human I was.  
  
That no matter what I did for her, it couldn't be enough.  
  
In annoyance, I closed my eyes as I took her to the bed. My heart beat so fast I thought that I was going to die at that moment.  
Either way wouldn't matter right now, now would it?  
  
A little roughly, I laid her half on the bed with her shoes still touching the ground. She looked up at me as I placed my hands to each side of her shoulders on the bed.  
I kept on looking at her as my shirt scarcely touched her apron.  
  
I made you in the image of what I thought was beautiful, Yuzuki…  
  
It was then that I kissed her on the forehead. "You can kiss someone on the forehead and on the cheek as a greeting. It is a form of affection."  
  
I made you from the likeness my sister, but I made you for myself…  
  
Leaning forward, I kissed her again on the lips. "When you kiss someone on the lips, it means that you love them. That they are more precious than anyone else you know in the world."  
  
"Why must it be here?" She touched my lips with a puzzled face.  
  
"Because you want to be closer to that person…as if you can drink them. Their happiness and their sadness together."  
  
Yuzuki gazed at me and we searched for one another with this stare.  
  
"Do you understand?" I asked.  
  
"A little, Minoru-sama."  
  
That's how we'd always be. Looking at one another, wanting to be closer.   
Isn't this true, Yuzuki? We'll never be completely together.  
  
No matter how much I want to make you deeper, I see my own shortcomings…  
  
  
How will I ever sleep tonight? Why am I hoping for tomorrow to never come?  
It was the same question as always, do you know that, Yuzuki?  
  
I spent sleepless nights looking at you.   
Because I knew our time would be too short…  
  
Leaning my head on her shoulder, I said, "Can we sleep like this?"  
  
"As you wish, Minoru-sama."  
  
She went into standby mode and I looked up to her 'sleeping face.'   
  
If you could feel what was truly happening, you would be mad at the world. You would be very upset with me, most of all.  
  
  
I'm sorry, Yuzuki…  
I knew I was selfish to make you as the tangible form of my loneliness...  
  
  
Nonetheless, I will fight against this with all that I have to give you.  
  
  
Closing my eyes, I began to cry on her clothing.  
  
  
Whenever you say, "I don't understand,"  
Those words are always against me, Yuzuki.   
  
  
You won't ever truly understand…  
And I might not ever learn.  
  
For you are my strength  
And yet you are my weakness.  
  
  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
author's note: Oh my, getting a little melodramatic here. --;; I try not to be angsty, but I can't help it. It's a part of my nature.  
And wow, I don't know guys. I'm happy to get feedback, but when you know people are actually on standby to read your works…  
Well, yeah, so I got a little paranoid. Yea! * does a little happy dance * I'm wanted! 


	4. Chapter 3 The course of action So blin...

Disclaimer: Chobits is by Clamp.  
  
Forever Yours  
By Miyamoto Yui  
  
Chapter 3 – The course of action. So blind.  
  
In the middle of the night, I rolled to one side and studied Yuzuki's face while holding a piece of her hair in my hands.  
I didn't know what to do with her.  
  
Should I check her more often? I already checked her on a regular basis and updated whatever I needed to as soon as possible.  
  
Should I keep her here in the house? But she'll grow lonely. Persocoms were made not to feel anything, but I know that she would learn nothing more from staying at home.  
Except, how could I let her go after seeing the discrimination with my own eyes?  
  
My eyes became slits as my blood boiled like hot water steaming. I was so upset by what I had seen…  
  
Should I leave her on standby mode?  
  
I calmed down again as soon as I had asked myself this question.   
  
I couldn't do that.  
My chest began to ache.  
It would be the same as if-  
  
I don't want to think about that.  
  
I sighed.   
  
I had to think of this calmly and coolly. All that would instantly change the instant I would find that Yuzuki was troubled by someone or something, though.  
  
Then, the words of my grandmother came to me. I had visited her just a week ago with Yuzuki waiting for me in another room because my grandmother wanted me to talk to me privately.  
Grandmother Maria sat next to me on the couch. She was patting my head as she gave me a sad smile while saying, "You'll have to choose someday: Between yourself and Yuzuki-san."  
"What do you mean?" I asked her as I sat on the couch next to her sipping my tea. "You know how much I care for Yuzuki-san."  
She nodded understandingly. "That's why. You have to carry on your household, Minoru-kun, whether or not you like it."  
  
My heart ached as I perfectly understood her words.  
  
"As much as you enjoy being with Yuzuki-san…" She looked down to the carpeted floor as she took her hand away from my head. Then, she got up and drank her tea while looking out the glass window of her living room. "She will give you much sadness."  
  
"How could you say this to me?" I harshly asked as I put my teacup onto the saucer a little harder than I wanted. Then, I sighed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. I understand what you are saying and it is true."  
  
It was something that I knew would eventually come as I would grow older and older. An undeniable fate.  
  
She turned around and looked at me deeply. "You will bring her much sorrow also."  
  
Yuzuki's beautiful eyes came to mind, especially that time that she had decided on her own to hack into that system. And here I was outside of the door pounding my hands shouting her name. Pounding and pounding until I thought my hands would go through the door because it was piercing my heart the longer I waited with nothing to say.  
  
Wasn't this the same thing?   
  
  
That incident that was ever vivid in my memory. It was something I would have never done for anyone else.  
  
I…  
I cried for my sister…  
  
But I knew I would cry endlessly for Yuzuki if she ever left me.  
  
They say persocoms are dependent on their master to help them on how to function in society. But did people ever realize that persocoms only further show the shortcomings of humanity?  
I needed Yuzuki like no other person in the world. And because of that, I had brought her down with me in my weakness…  
  
  
Still holding onto Yuzuki's hair, I smelled it. Then, I let it go as I wrapped her in my blanket and left the room. I knew I wouldn't be able to go to sleep tonight.  
In the kitchen, I made myself some tea. Then, I walked over to my study and turned on the light.  
As soon as I sat down on my computer chair, I took a sip of my tea and pondered on my next move while moving back and forth in my chair. Putting my tea down on one corner, I took out a letter out of one of the drawers.  
It was the one that I was about to read while Yuzuki was out, but I didn't get a chance to. Or rather, I wanted to prolong what I suspected to be the content of this letter.  
  
But when I looked more at it, I shook my head. I didn't think I was ready to get more frustrated at that moment.   
  
"You're not a coward, Minoru," I told myself. Then, I sighed as I tore one side of this red envelope in my hands.  
  
I began to read in silence:  
  
"Dear Minoru-kun,  
  
Hello, my dear! I hope that you are faring well. I also hope that you are not too troubled by what we had talked about a few days ago.  
I didn't mean for you to leave with such a long face. I was only stating to you what was ahead of you.  
For, you will be going to college soon, and we'll have to make preparations soon. By the time you are of age, you'll have to take over the family business as your father and mother have planned out for you.  
I wanted to discuss this with you as soon as possible for a course of action so that everything will go smoothly. I don't want you to be unhappy, Minoru, but please think about what I have said and what I will be saying to you.  
In the coming weeks, I will be sending you various files to get you started early as well as going to various companies to get an edge. But I know you very well. You've probably already researched on them and know some course of action.  
So, please call me soon and let's have tea again with Yuzuki.  
  
Love always,  
Grandma"  
  
I folded the letter and put it back into the drawer to read it again the next afternoon when I would fully focus on it.  
  
As I laid back on my chair, I sat there like an insomniac staring at the ceiling.  
  
"You might as well as have told me, 'Fix your doubts and keep your mind clear,'" I mumbled sarcastically to myself.  
I knew she meant well, but I also knew how harsh she could be. That was why it was optimal to be on good terms with her from the start. This I had learned from experience.  
  
But I knew, there would come a day that she would tell me this. Just as harshly as she had told me to pick between myself or Yuzuki, I knew she'd eventually tell me, "You are human, Minoru. Remember that."  
  
"That's why…that's why this is so damn hard," I whispered to myself as my voice echoed all around me.  
  
  
I put my arms to each side of my chair and looked up to the ceiling.  
  
  
Through the silence of the house, I felt as if it was telling me that I had to choose to be alone.  
  
I would be alone all over again.  
  
  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
Author's notes: * sighs * Oh my…now we're going to get just worse and worse with the angst from here…  
Poor Minoru. I'm sorry that I'm not very good with details, but I'll try my best to show Yuzuki's feelings better. It's just difficult because Yuzuki is hard to convey without looking at her since she thinks in terms of 1's and 0's and cannot fully express herself. 


	5. Chapter 4 Confidence in you

Disclaimer: Chobits is by Clamp.  
  
Forever Yours  
By miyamoto yui  
  
  
Chapter 4 – Confidence in you.  
  
  
After what seemed to be forever, my eyes wandered to the Angelic Layer clock in front of me and what perfect timing too. It was about time for a random doll to come out. In my desparation, my heart wished it would give me some kind of sign. You know, those kind of things in which you make a split-second decision like, "I'll do this, if this happens."  
In a little ruckus all by itself on the wall, just like myself on this chair, the miniature door opened and someone was walking out.   
  
Tap, tap, tap…  
  
My eyes blinked heavily as I watched with silent anticipation for the next day, not wanting it to come at all. For, in all my childishness, my sadness began to overwhelm me once more. I was enveloped within the seams of its warm blanket, only too familiar with the feeling.   
  
As my head began to tilt to one side in sleepiness, I saw the long, black hair behind the tall figure of Suzuka. She walked up to the edge of the little walkway that had come from the door and elegantly bowed. Then, she said, "It is now four o'clock."  
  
Turning around silently, she walked back into the egg and the walkway went back into the egg and so the door closed shut.  
I smiled a little smile as she gave me hope.  
  
Hatako-san…  
  
The youngest contender at the beginning of the Angelic Layer competitions. She had risen just as quickly as lightning. That's why that was her signature move: So quiet, yet so deadly.  
Only someone so calm and collected could ever be so disciplined. And so, her doll reflected her feelings brightly.  
  
Was that what I was supposed to do?   
Was I supposed to not care what was ahead of me, and just remember that whatever made me who I am and what made me happy was all that mattered in the world? Even if it meant that I went against the fate that had been assigned to me since my birth?  
  
You couldn't imagine how proud my father was when he had my sister and then he had me…  
  
I sighed.  
  
"Oh Yuzuki…" my voice trailed off as my eyelids began to droop.  
  
And like the angel that I loved with all my heart, I heard a click of the door. Slowly turning my chair, I saw Yuzuki standing before me. With a sad look on her face, she shook her head as she held a dark, green blanket over one arm.  
  
"You should go back to your bed, Minoru-sama," she whispered softly.  
  
That was her way of telling me she was worried about me.  
  
  
As she was about to put the blanket over me, I pulled her to my lap. She looked from side to side as her eyebrows came closer and closer to one another.   
  
"Just hold me, Yuzuki," I sweetly told her as I wrapped the blanket over us.  
  
Then, under the blanket, I wrapped her arms over my waist as I held her closer to my chest.  
  
"Close your eyes and let's go to sleep, Yuzuki…" I sleepily told her.  
  
Of her own volition, she held me a bit tighter as I told her this. The tears I had kept inside of me began to fall onto her hair.  
  
You didn't understand…  
You don't understand why you always look for me whenever I'm gone from my bedroom when I should be asleep there.  
  
Many years ago, she had tried her hardest to comprehend why she had to find me.   
"When I saw you weren't in your room, I surmised all the possibilities of what could have happened to you." Her eyes, which had been watching me all this time, gave me a helpless expression unlike any other. "I…was worried."  
Shaking my head, I took her hand into both of my mine and patted it. My heart felt very happy that she felt that way, but a part of me hated myself for wanting her to feel that way at all.  
  
  
I couldn't describe it then, but if she asked me again, I would have been able to answer her this time.   
I would tell you that humans always look for what they are missing. And when it's already yours, you become more vulnerable when you lose it.  
You risk losing so much, yet you gave so much to gain just as much.  
  
For some time, I had been so overworked that I just came here to sleep, and I didn't realize the extent of its impact on Yuzuki until she had told me that. Until she had uttered those words, I didn't think that it was somewhat wrong to work so hard.   
  
Nothing else mattered if you couldn't live life to its fullest…  
And that meant being healthy.  
  
  
This made me happy though. For me to know that as I seek her, she reached back for me.  
She would look for me…  
  
  
My eyes closed at that moment and I peacefully went to sleep with my Yuzuki in my arms.  
  
  
But something in the back of my mind, as always, was gnawing away at me. That certain feeling was coming back to me.  
The one that told me that I couldn't control everything about Yuzuki's environment or programming. That I had lost her in some way because I had made her.  
  
I just had to let her be.  
Like always.  
  
  
"Minoru-sama? Minoru-sama?"  
When I opened my eyes, Yuzuki's blue plates reflected me looking at her. I blinked sleepily as she announced, "It is now six a.m."  
I nodded my head as I rubbed my eyes. "Yes. Thank you, Yuzuki."  
  
As she was getting off of me, I pulled her head between my hands and kissed her on the forehead with a smile.   
Like a little kid, I said, "Mine."  
  
Desparate and sincere.  
That's all that could come out of my mouth.  
  
Yuzuki let out a sigh as she shook her head. "You are not going according to your usual pattern, Minoru-sama."  
  
She then got up as I began to fold the blanket because I wouldn't let her do it.   
  
"You're doing all the things that have such little chance of being done," she mused as she tilted her head in slight contemplation.   
  
"That's both a blessing and curse for people, isn't it?" I answered as I patted her back.   
  
While going our separate ways in the hall, I looked back at Yuzuki walking to the kitchen.  
  
  
Hurriedly, I changed and ate breakfast. While running out the door, Yuzuki was so flustered as to what was happening to me. I laughed when she thought it was what people called 'adolescence'.   
I shook my head to point at her and say, "No, it's because of you."  
  
She handed my lunch to me as I saw her attempt to curve her lips again.  
  
That made me smile even more.  
  
Yes, it's because I love you.  
Nothing else.  
  
  
I ran with my lunch in my hands and felt like I had done a one-eighty in one night. That was her fault though.  
My programming's so out of whack whenever it came to Yuzuki. Sheesh.  
  
  
As I turned to the corner that led to Hideki-san's apartment, my grandmother's words rang in my ears and burdened my heart once more:  
  
"You'll have to choose someday: Between yourself and Yuzuki-san."  
  
  
People always told me I was quiet, yet very smart…  
For a long time, I thought that was what made me, me.  
  
I smirked with all the confidence that I could conjure up at the moment. "How could you think I never thought of this, Grandmother?"  
  
  
Yuzuki and I are two halves of broken angels with black wings that make a whole. The feathers are falling one by one until we are fallen, becoming humans. Becoming mortal.  
  
I have looked for her for a long time as she slept in the recesses of my mind.  
  
  
I didn't know I needed her until I brought her into life.  
  
  
  
Slowly, I walked up to Hibiya-san's door and lifted up my hand to knock on the door.  
  
  
  
  
Tsuzuku…  
  
--  
Author's notes: School had taken me over and so I was unable to make another entry for this. It was either make a fanfic or don't sleep at all (and I already get an insufficient amount of hours in the first place). Sometimes, I just say oh f--- it, but I really need to sleep more.  
To those who have been standing by for this fic, thank you. For a few weeks now, I've been out of writing this fic not only because I've had no time, but my lack of self-confidence struck me again. So, I had to deal with that and with the fact that I didn't know how to twist this the way I wanted with a 'oh god, can't believe I'm going to do that and people will hate me…but oh, well. ^^;;;'  
I read over this whole fic the other day. It's hard to compliment yourself when you're always so self-critical. Not to mention the fact that one reader had e-mailed me and made me go 'ding! Oh, they're so right! ^_^' What I mean is that they made me focus on why the hell I started this fic in the first place by asking what did I think of Chobits. In a simplified answer, I said that it was to show people that you can't live by yourself and must love someone unconditionally, despite their weaknesses and with all their strengths. Persocoms show your vulnerability, but they were made and make someone whole while complementing one another. But, going back to reading this fic (oh, I'm starting to go off tangent like in Soseki's essay, I love that author), I had read it all over again because people were so excited over it. And I thought, 'All I write are mostly angsty, and so why I am making Chobits more sad than it should be?' Then, I understood (like when I read all of Aching Desire when I got to chapter 31) why I loved this pairing so much and why I wanted to write this again. I am not good with explaining things, so I hope the fic will be sufficient.  
  
The choosing of the doll was actually quite difficult. If you have watched/read Angelic Layer, each of these dolls have a different message. At first, I wanted it to be Hikaru, but the salient meaning of her name would be overbearing with its message, so I turned to Suzuka since Hatako (who is my favorite in AL, to the point that I got my outfit custom-made for her) said it didn't matter what you are, it's who you are that counts. That is what is truly strong. 


	6. Chapter 5 Time is my enemy

Disclaimer: Chobits is by Clamp.  
  
Forever Yours  
By miyamoto yui  
  
  
Chapter 5 – Time is my enemy.  
  
  
"Hai?" Hibiya-san called from behind the closed door as I heard the taps of her feet upon the floor. "I'm coming."  
  
When she opened the door, the smell of green tea lightly found itself to my nose. She bowed her head at the same time I did. With uncertainty playing a wistful tune in my head, my smirk had faded as I truly realized the reality of what I was doing because of my agonizing.  
  
"Good morning, Hibiya-san," I greeted politely as she greeted me back also with a hand leading into her apartment. "Good morning, Minoru-kun. Please do come in."  
  
"Thank you very much," I said as I sat on the table as she sat across me to serve me tea.  
  
"What brings you here so early?" she asked as she poured some tea into a cup and got up to get another one from her dish rack. "Is something wrong?"  
  
I nodded as I held the cup between both of my hands while looking at the steam rise. Through the steam, I blinked and looked directly at Hibiya-san.   
  
"Something is wrong with Yuzuki." My eyes remained looking at Hibiya-san as I let go of my cup. "I don't know what it is, but in my heart, I know that it is serious."  
She took a sip of her tea and blinked her eyes in concern. "What happened?"  
"Yesterday, she told me that she had trouble coming home." After taking a slow slip, I then said, "I thought it was just a minor glitch, but then when I checked her, I found that it was more than that."  
"Why would you think that?" She took another sip of her tea. "Has this happened before?"  
"No…" I shook my head. "Actually, it hasn't."  
  
Then, I deeply looked at Hibiya-san as I sighed while saying, "And I have this feeling it will just get worse from here. Somehow, yesterday's events triggered it."  
  
"What exactly do you mean?"  
  
Then, I explained everything that I had seen in Yuzuki's memory. It made me upset to think that she had gone through that while I was gone, but there was nothing I could do about it…  
  
"…and in the end, she told me she has only a little time left." I shook my head again as I sighed apprehensively. "She doesn't know what it is, but she knows it's there."  
  
Finishing my tea, I held the cup with shaky hands. "I don't know what to do."  
  
With a warm hand over mine, Hibiya-san nodded her head. "Please have her come here then. I will check her."  
  
"Thank you so much," I gratefully said as I let go and bowed in deep thanks.   
  
Then, I excused myself and quickly went to school.  
  
  
Hibiya-san's glassy eyes flashed in my head as she held my hand. The smile could never have shadowed over her sorrow. With her eyes, I saw the same exact expression she gave when she told me about the history of Chii, her sister and her deceased husband, the creator of Angelic Layer.   
  
I knew that she would understand.  
  
There was no one else who could…  
  
  
Taking out my cel phone, I called Yuzuki while running. There was just no time for anything anymore, was there?   
  
"Hello?" I breathlessly said into the phone. "Yuzuki?"  
  
She answered, "Hai. Minoru-sama?"   
  
"For today, everything you have scheduled has to be pushed back. Please go immediately to Hibiya-san's house."  
  
"Hai."  
  
"I'll see you later then." I flipped the phone cover and placed it back into my pocket.  
  
  
  
When I came to the gates of my school, I was fortunate to get there on time with room to spare. As I pushed the door of my classroom to one side, I kept my eyes focused on my seat, which was the one exactly in the middle of the whole room.  
The boys in the back where once again annoyingly talking and laughing loudly. I took my seat and took out of my belongings to put on my desk.  
  
After yesterday, I had never known…  
I had not know that Yuzuki also faced the same difficulties as myself…  
  
  
What I had tried to prevent with all my might had all been useless.  
  
  
I took out a literature book and began to read it as they began their row of slanderous remarks at one another, trying to get my attention.  
I had heard them all before. It wasn't only because of Yuzuki, but for living alone or the case of my missing parents. Why weren't they in my life wasn't any of their business.  
That didn't even include all the persocoms it took to complete to satisfy my liking. I had made each one to do a specific task, but I had no attachment to any of them.  
  
Because _she_ was still here. I'd stick to my sister…  
But when she went away, there was no one else to cling onto. There was no one else in the world that I could turn to.  
There was no one to call my name so lovingly.  
  
Trying not to lose my memory or my sanity, I didn't go to school. I stayed in my house like a hermit for about two days until I realized that staying would do me no good. My sister would hate me for being such a wimp.  
I had promised to protect her, but I couldn't in the end. That was beyond our control…  
  
I meticulously remained in my shell even more than before. The little boy that had been so shy and quiet, yet was the top of the class, was even more pitiful.  
  
For a time, I thought that I had to be the most pitiful thing in the world. In my room and all its darkness, I clung onto my pillow crying and crying. I wasn't a person because I felt so rejected from society. She was the only one that connected me to that world outside.  
Now, she was no longer here.   
  
The tie had been severed.  
  
I began to just spend all my time with my computer. If I didn't eat, sleep, or go to school, I was there in my seat. Researching and researching, I tried to make design for her.  
It got to the point that I started to have dreams of the persocom I wanted to bring to life.  
  
This one called Yuzuki.   
  
I didn't know what to call her then, but it was a name that had softly whispered into my ear. "If I were to fall in love with someone, what would I call her?" I had laughed to myself, but at that moment, I looked at the gigantic monitor showing the latest battle of the Angelic Layer dolls.  
  
It wasn't the doll that won that had caught my attention, but the one that lost. The purpled-haired one called Yuzu. She stood so quiet, yet so strong.  
From then on, I put my own thoughts into this name. "Yuuki for courage…"  
I even laughed as I said, "Yuki."  
  
Just like Sai-san's Shirohime…  
My sister's best friend, Sai…  
  
  
That's how her name came about, though it isn't salient to anyone but myself. "Yuzuki," I said as I finished painting her lips.  
  
After months of failures, I found a sweet-looking, young woman sitting in front of me. One that resembled my ideal one: my sister.  
  
  
When she opened her beautiful eyes, I knew that it was she.  
The images of my sister and the girl in my dream eclipsed.  
  
  
But because I was only sociable in the cyberworld, I had drifted from the flow of others around me. Though totally aware of my surroundings and polite to those around me, there was still something that made me so removed from others.   
In the end, all I really needed was for someone to care for to give me strength to endure all this. And I wanted someone to care for me…  
  
Illusion as it was…  
  
The existence of Yuzuki had given me much strength…  
  
Also, her existence had given me hardship. Falling in love with her put me against myself…  
And against others…  
  
For many, many different reasons. Money, heir, good status, titles…  
All the selfishness of humanity: Greed, jealousy and power.  
  
Yet, I was truly happy with her by my side because she existed…  
That's all that mattered to me.  
  
I would never let her know how much I was ridiculed and bullied because I had made her. They didn't know I was in love with her, but they knew that they couldn't come close to me because I always looked like I had everything. Somehow, it had to do with Yuzuki: a persocom that wasn't counted as 'real'.  
  
  
Those women were right in a sense. I didn't need anyone because of Yuzuki.  
She sincerely cared for me…  
  
And I would never betray that.  
  
  
I sighed as I worried, but then I shot a harsh glance as someone joked perversely, "If I were that rich, I think I'd make myself a woman too. Only, persocoms don't necessarily count as a woman. They can never give what a real one could."   
  
"Everyone has their limitations," I answered nonchalantly. "You can't understand because you're so concerned on what's real that you fear that something inanimate may be more real than you can ever be."  
  
"You little bastard!" Moshimoto-san shouted as he eyed me with his friends holding him back from jumping me. "You think you're so much better than everyone. Just because your family contributes the most doesn't make you the owner of the school."  
  
I shook my head. "I know that very well. Unfortunately, you don't."  
  
"One day, no one's going to save you," he said as he sat back on his seat as the teacher opened the door of the classroom.  
  
"Never expected anyone to." I turned around and smiled. "I fight alone."  
  
  
Then, the lessons of the day began, and my long days at school began. Only today seemed kind of lighter than usual.  
Then again, nothing could be worse for me than losing Yuzuki…  
  
  
Yes, that's right, though.  
  
I do fight alone. And Yuzuki always hated me for it. She always wanting to do more, yet I didn't want to burden her.  
Only, we found ourselves keeping secrets from one another, even if we gave everything we could to one another…  
  
  
As I opened the lunch that Yuzuki had made for me, my cel began to beep. Immediately putting my chopsticks down, I answered it.  
  
"Hello, Kokubunji desu."  
  
"Minoru-kun…" Hibiya-san's voice trailed off. "I found it."  
  
I sighed in relief with hope in my voice. "That's great! I knew I could count on you, Hibiya-san."  
  
Silence.  
  
It was then that my stomach churned. "What's wrong, Hibiya-san?"  
  
"Yuzuki-san has a program that I can't get into," she said with a concerned voice.  
  
Things had taken a turn for the worst…  
My eyes wandered from side to side. "A secret program?"  
  
"It has a self-timer." She sighed and I held the phone even closer to my ear as I stared at the lunch in front of me.  
  
"I never put that there."  
  
"I figured that out."  
  
"Then what is it?"  
  
"I don't truly understand yet."  
  
  
My heart beat faster and faster in nervousness…  
  
"But unfortunately," she sighed. "The program has already been activated."  
  
  
  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
  
Author's notes: Nothing is more sweet as when someone says, "You know I check everyday if you've updated." And so, out of guilt, I write; also, out of flattery. @_@  
I didn't realize how much I thought of my stories until I answered someone (several years ago) by saying, "But I put this to mean this and that doesn't even include this. This person's name is a pun for this…" In other words, you'll find a lot here. ^^v --;; 


	7. Chapter 6 When you walk away

Disclaimer: Chobits isn't mine, but Clamp. Utada owns 'simple and clean'.   
  
Forever yours  
By miyamoto yui  
  
Chapter 6 – when you walk away.  
  
If this were some drama that happened on television, I wanted to know who was playing the fool and watching me in my moment of agony.   
I felt like I was being watched for someone's cruel enjoyment as I held the cel phone in my hand trying not to get upset enough to throw it away or let it easily slip from my fingers.  
  
Like Yuzuki's hair…  
  
"I'll be right there," I said calmly as I kept that complacent smile on my face. The one that made me go on automatic mode in which I was unaware that I appeared as if nothing had happened at all.  
That was what scared and worried my sister whenever I got really mad or upset.  
  
I wouldn't show that I was feeling that way.  
  
Looking at my lunch one more time, I closed it and packed it up in my lap. Then, I got up, put it into my school bag and just went to my locker.  
Without looking back, I just walked straight out of the school.  
  
Normally, I would have taken the bus, but Yuzuki was leading me on. With my hands in fists, I found myself walking faster and faster.  
So fast to the point that my heart beat so quickly I couldn't breathe and my asthma kicked in. Shaking my head, I closed my eyes as I tried to not grab my heart.  
  
The same as the last time…  
The feeling that I would lose her…  
  
  
As I passed by the Angelic Layer monitor while a battle was going on, I got a call on my cel. Trying to catch my breath, I looked up to the two dolls fighting as I said, "Hai, Kokubunji desu."  
  
A familiar voice responded, "Minoru-kun, it's me."  
  
My eyes watched a white AL doll dressed with an angel outfit that looked similar to that of the comic 'Wish' on Kohaku being kicked directly on the stomach and falling to the ground. The other doll, a dark-caped doll that looked similar to Suzuka, but it was dressed with a high school uniform, stood yards off with his arms folded in indifference.  
  
"Hello, Grandmother," I greeted while trying to still catch my breath.  
  
"Did I call you at a bad time, Dear?" she asked me as I shook my head to say, "No, I was just running around."  
  
"I'm sorry to bother you, but I wanted to ask you if you could come over to my house after school. I think we should start as soon as possible, as I had said in my note."   
  
There was a strange silence.  
  
"I'm sorry, but I have something really important to do this afternoon. Can I reschedule it for next week?" My eyes continued to watch the battle as the white angel jumped and came back to the platform to give a punch to the neck of the black-clothed doll.  
  
"No, I'm afraid that isn't possible," she firmly replied.  
  
A shiver went down my spine.  
  
"I need to go now. I'm sorry, Grandmother. I will call again later."  
  
"That won't be necessary, Minoru-kun."   
Silence.  
"Please completely turn around," she instructed.  
  
At that moment, there she was parked on the street with her servant coming to get me and lead me away to her home…  
  
Without so much as a word, a cold silence distanced us. Though she had loved me, according to my father, since I was in my mother's womb forming, this was the side of my grandmother that I had not wanted to ever come across.  
The business one with a Noh face of a woman smiling elegantly, yet you didn't know what was happening underneath.  
  
When I got to her home, there was a stack of files on her desk within her study. I walked up to the files as my grandmother closed the door behind her.  
As she sat behind her desk, my eyes became slits with an unhappy frown that didn't want to show a scowl.  
  
"What are these?" I asked as I pushed the file in my arm towards her, almost too disgusted to look at how far she had gone behind my back.   
  
  
I guess I had to try harder to be one step ahead of her…  
  
  
"First, you have to pick whom you will marry, Minoru-kun," she answered as if it were the most natural thing in the world to say.  
  
My face became blank as I put the file back on the stack. "Grandmother, I'm only sixteen-years-old."  
  
Let age save me for a brief moment, please…  
But she could see through me like Yuzuki can when she muses over looking at a glass and sees my face through it…  
  
"That's what happened with your father," she said with her hands folded and a deadpan look that conveyed no emotion.  
  
"And that's why my sister and I never lived together," I answered as I looked straight at her without remorse to the tone that had began to form latently upon my voice. "We had two different mothers."  
  
"Is something bothering you, Minoru? Usually you're so agreeable." Her tone became dark. "I didn't give you the warning earlier to make you prolong your decisions. It was to expedite them."  
  
I shook my head as I sighed while trying to be as direct as possible. "I'm not giving up Yuzuki, Grandmother."  
  
"And the truth comes out." Her face stiffened as she got up from her chair and looked out the window that was behind her.   
  
Bowing my head, I politely excused myself. "I'm sorry, but I really must go home right now."  
  
"I'm not asking you to give her up, Minoru-kun. I'm telling you to." She sighed as she continued to watch the window and whatever was happening outside of it. "Do you really think things are that simple in life?"  
  
She turned her towards my direction with a disappointed expression. "Are you really going to risk your father's name for a persocom, Minoru-kun?"  
  
Shaking her head, my grandmother blinked her eyes and folded her hands. I couldn't read if her face conveyed pity or frustration as she said with a sigh, "I'll let you go for now."  
  
My right ear felt like they had been pricked as I turned around to leave. Bowing again, I answered, "Father had told me to always be happy. My sister only wanted me to be happy."  
  
Looking at her straight in the face, I finished, "Yuzuki is my happiness."  
  
  
Then, I left as she said, "I'm trying to help you too."  
  
As the door closed, I heard her say as if her words were darts finding themselves invisibly pinned onto my chest where my heart should have been, "When you're older, you'll understand."  
  
It triggered that song…  
  
Waving my hands to her attendants to not help me, I ran out of the front gate. I rushed once more with only Yuzuki on my mind.  
  
Like a ghost that wanted to kill me as softly as a violin piece that my sister had made for me years ago, _that_ damned song played in my head   
The one that Yuzuki seemed to bob her head and quietly tried to learn when she listened to it on her walkman. It was the purple one that I had given to her when she looked up to the Angelic Layer battle monitor only a few weeks ago…  
  
I clearly remembered when we watched an exhibition show by Hikaru and Wizard. They were doing a dance routine that integrated a whole battle with music playing in the background like a movie.  
When we clapped at the end of the performance, we were going to turn around, but a part of a music video played from an idol of old. She did video games and pop music that many people around the world enjoyed both in Japanese and English.  
  
"Oh, that song," I mumbled miserably to myself.  
I was trying to not pay attention to it because it made me feel depressed, but Yuzuki's braids flew softly in a half-circle motion as she whipped her head to stare at the television above her.   
I thought it was because she was fascinated by this old song that made me cringe my fingers beneath my black gloves and hold onto the pockets of my coat as if I would grate my fingernails into my palms from the pain.  
  
I didn't know what was happening, but the song played and Yuzuki was mesmerized instantly just as much as I was enchanted looking at her. The wind blew and I watched her profile.  
  
Her eyes became downcast for a moment as she mimed the words with much familiarity. These words I wished she never knew,  
  
"When you walk away   
You don't hear me say,  
'Please, oh baby,   
Don't go.'"  
  
I blinked as I saw her cross that line of illusion that made her 'human' to me…  
  
I was pained by this. Yet, already condemning myself to the person I had silently fallen for, I couldn't help but feel like a painter who became enraptured by watching a painting for years to find that it could live and breathe. Leaning so close to it that you could feel the paint pulsate under your fingers out of its beauty.  
  
At that moment, she tilted her head and directly looked at me. Shaking her head slowly, Yuzuki mimed the words as if she could sing with her lips moving in sync to this singer of old:  
  
"Don't get me wrong I love you  
But does that mean I have to meet your father?  
When we are older you'll understand  
What I meant when I said 'No,  
I don't think life is quite that simple…'"  
  
The music stopped and Yuzuki, who usually was confused when she became embarrassed when she expressed something that she thought she shouldn't have, didn't clasp her hands together.   
Instead, she turned around and nodded her head. "I'm sorry I delayed us."  
  
I wanted to grab her shoulders and tell her that that was all right to feel that way.   
  
That's why I hated that song. With all of my heart.  
  
  
It was the one that played when my sister died…  
It was the one that played coincidentally when I created you…  
  
And somehow, you knew that though I never told you.  
  
  
I ran towards Hibiya-san's apartment with this single hope within me.   
  
For that one look,  
When she 'sang' to me though she half understood…  
  
Would you truly understand that, Grandmother?  
  
  
Yuzuki's 'heart' knew what it wanted to say to me though she couldn't say it to me.  
And I couldn't show her how much I loved her in return.  
  
  
Images of Yuzuki flickered like an old film inside of my head to keep me going towards her.  
To dare to hope…  
  
Smile.  
Laugh.  
Lift up the hand to the mouth in embarrassment.  
The wide eyes of confusion.  
The folding of her hands.  
The smell of her hair.  
The texture of her skin.  
  
The voice that told me, 'No, I'll stay with you as long as you want me here.'  
  
  
My heart ached as that idol's song went over and over in my head as I mimed them to myself:   
  
"Wish I could prove I love you  
But does that mean I have to walk on water?  
When we are older you'll understand  
It's enough when I say so  
And maybe some things are that simple…"  
  
  
I ran faster and faster towards Hibiya-san's place as I let my fists go to find drops of blood already making a trail of little blemishes behind me...  
  
…waiting and vulnerable…  
…to be stepped upon, voluntarily.  
  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
author's note: yes, I'm sorry that this is going really slow, but I'm really that way. I know where this is going, but if it doesn't build, I'm really gonna waste the fic. And I really do enjoy and love it, dramatic as it is.  
In case you didn't know, yes, I'm an rpg freak. (Been playing final fantasy since I was ten years old.) 


	8. Chapter 7 in my name, for my sake

Disclaimer: Chobits isn't mine. It's by Clamp.  
  
forever yours  
By miyamoto yui  
Chapter 7 – in my name, for my sake.  
As I got closer to Hibiya-san's apartment complex, I took out a handkerchief. It was the light violet one that Yuzuki had ironed for me just two days ago because I was starting to have a cold.   
Though she tried not to bluntly tell me to take care of myself, she knew that I was already starting to have a cold. All this activity wasn't helping it either, though I tried to pretend that there was nothing physically wrong with me.  
  
Rubbing my hands on it, I held it out, noting that I had stained it so much that I didn't know if it could be cleaned at all…  
  
As I entered the gate once more, there was Yuzuki sitting on the steps with a tilting of her head. She was staring at some birds that had all made a congregation with all their chirping on the grass. Her hands were folded over one another.  
  
Inside my mind, I wanted to scream, "What the hell is wrong?! My girl doesn't have anything wrong. I'm looking at her and she is as she has always been."  
  
"Ah, Minoru-sama," Yuzuki smiled as she looked at me. She got up and nodded her head.  
  
"Hello, Yuzuki," I greeted back as Hibiya-san exited the threshold with a broom in her hands. "Ah, I was about to sweep. Hello, Minoru-kun!"  
  
"Hello again," I said as I shook my head in disbelief.   
  
Weren't they supposed to be in the room researching? I don't understand what's going on…  
Maybe the logical part of my brain had escaped for sure and I was just paranoid.  
  
For a girl that always smiled at me, even if it pained her…  
  
"Please stay here for a moment, Yuzuki-san," Hibiya-san said as she patted Yuzuki's shoulder. She then turned to me and took my hand to lead me back to her apartment.  
  
Again, she gave me tea as I tell her why I was delayed in coming. She nodded understandingly as she sighed while hearing my story about my grandmother 'kidnapping' me temporarily and wanting me to find a bride immediately.  
"She is just concerned," Hibiya-san responded as she sipped some of her tea. "That's all."  
  
I looked straight into Hibiya-san's eyes and put my cup down. "I understand, but I like my life the way it is."  
"But what about Yuzuki?" she asked as her eyes become concerned mixed with pity. "You must understand that she feels confused about what is going on. She will blame this on herself, in time."  
"I've been telling her that I've chosen her and I shall stand by her no matter what happens," I answered confidently. "If anyone wants to kill me, taking her would be their best shot."  
Hibiya-san sighed as she continued, "Have you asked her about how she feels about this? Will you even tell her about what your grandmother did this afternoon?"  
  
"Of course," I answered with a matter-of-fact tone, "I tell her everything."  
  
Hibiya-san then got up and knelt down next to me. Then, she shook her head as she hugged me. "Minoru-kun…"  
  
"What happened while I was gone?" I pleaded, now more than ever worried.  
She then let go of me as she said, "I'm worried about her even more."  
"Why? Is it the program?"   
"I can't get in. It has been masterfully maneuvered. Impenetrable…almost as if Yuzuki had done it herself with such perfection that only she can activate and de-activate it."  
"But why would-"  
"She is like my two daughters." She then shook her head as she pushed me away while still holding onto my shoulders. "Yuzuki may be closing upon herself. And somehow it was triggered by you."  
I pointed at myself in perplexity. "Me?"  
"You are her important person," she answered without hesitation.  
"As she is mine." I nodded understandingly. But it did not make some sense as I inquired, "Aren't only Chobits supposed to have a 'dake no hito'?"   
"The Chobits series is for them to learn like any normal person and adapt characteristics according to what they're taught. They choose their 'dake no hito' and let that person guide them on what to do next. That is what makes the Chobits series so special."  
She continued, "Since all persocoms are made from the Chobits series, they have this to a certain extent in which they only serve their master. They are all connected to Chii because they shall never have this trait again. They should not go haywire when they find their 'dake no hito' because after my daughter died, I didn't want another persocom or human to go through the extent of pain I had. Though there are others such as Ueda-san that have fallen in love with their persocom, the persocom is purposefully unable to return these feelings."  
  
"Then why would Yuzuki's program be triggered by me? I would never wish her harm."  
I looked from side to side almost feeling numb once more.  
"She is so advanced that she has figured out many things that normal, everyday persocoms could never achieve. Yuzuki is wanting to forget so that she can save you…even if caused her so much pain."  
  
Too many things were running through my head, making me so dizzy.   
Yuzuki pushing herself to show me something she didn't know she already had…  
  
I then asked, "But how did you come to this conclusion though you couldn't penetrate through that activated program?"  
  
"Yuzuki's 'alternate personality' talked to me while your Yuzuki was in standby mode. She told me that it was useless to try because she had started her own self-destruct mode."  
  
"What?!" I shouted in shock.  
  
"I couldn't tell you over the phone…" she said with sorrowful eyes.  
  
"She wants to return my feelings…" I mumbled to myself. "…and she's dying at the same time."  
  
Hibiya-san patted my head. "I'm sorry that's all I can say for now."  
  
I then bowed my head before Hibiya-san. "Thank you so much for taking care of her. I shall try to tend to her at home."  
  
"I'm sorry, Minoru-kun." That's all she could say to me.  
  
As I got up, I shook my head. "Please don't apologize, it's not your fault. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have ever found out these things. When I had checked her, that never happened to me."  
  
"If it weren't for me, many wouldn't suffer knowing how insufficient they were," she honestly told me. "My husband just wanted to make me happy with children I could never happen."  
  
"If it weren't for you, no one would know what happiness really was either." I nodded my head. "Myself included."  
  
Then, we looked out the window to find that it was raining very hard, but we had been so focused on our conversation that we had ignored everything. She then handed me an umbrella. I blinked as I looked at the end of the hall trying to find Yuzuki.  
"Yuzuki! Let's go home!" I called as Hibiya-san walked with me while patting my shoulder.  
  
When we got to the front, we opened the door to the small porch to find that Yuzuki wasn't there.   
  
And in her place, my bloodied handkerchief was left.  
  
"Yuzuki?" I could barely say as Hibiya-san also whispered, "Yuzuki-san?"  
  
As I squatted down to get my handkerchief, I found another substance on the cement. I touched the black substance, my lips tightened as tears came to my eyes as I raised them to watch the open gate swinging a little, back and forth.  
  
I pushed my finger on the cement. To make sure, I smelled the substance as I announced softly, "Oil…"  
  
"Minoru-kun!!" Hibiya-san shouted behind me as I left her umbrella on her porch and ran out of her complex shouting politely, "Thank you for everything!"  
  
As I ran from one block to another, I couldn't find her. I kept on searching and searching from one side of the city to the next. When it was approaching the middle of the night, I ran to the park as my last resort.  
  
I came to the playground not to find her there.  
  
Without discretion, I shouted at the top of my lungs with all my love and hurt, "YUZUKI!!!!!"  
  
Cursing the rain, I cried, "WHERE ARE YOU?!"  
  
"Don't…" My knees sank to the wet cement. Whether I was praying or begging, my eyes stared at the sky as a lightpost looked down at me.   
  
While crying along with the rain, I pleaded for her to return to me as the rain made my cries of pain a part of its pitter-pattering…  
  
We were doing this to ourselves…  
We were hurting each other with how much we cared for the other…  
  
Was this called love now?  
This infliction that we were dooming ourselves to?  
  
Even so, I would have no one else by my side. I chose that the day I had even conceived of making her…  
  
My voice cracked, "Don't you know how much I need you?"  
  
Shaking my head, I kneeled to the ground for someone up in the heavens to listen to me as I repeated once more, "If anyone wants to kill me, taking her would be their best shot."  
What was worse was that she had done this all by herself…  
In my name...  
Because she was learning to love me back…  
As a woman.  
As a human woman…  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
Author's note: Well, um, this arc is actually going a bit faster than I thought it would. I'm sorry for the delay, but many things have been going on. I also didn't know what I would do with the middle of this story, for I had the beginning and the end set up already. I was just confused as to how I would integrate the 'program' and discriminations that would be experienced by both Minoru and Yuzuki. Though I've stated some already, I needed to put some more, to make readers more 'enlightened' as well as myself.  
  
(* sighs * Aiya, I didn't notice that I had done the draft completely in 'present tense' when I had done this story all in 'past tense'!) 


	9. Chapter 8 More and less human

Disclaimer: chobits is by clamp.  
  
Forever yours   
By miyamoto yui  
Chapter 8- More and less human.  
  
"Minoru-kun…" a small voice called after me.  
  
But I couldn't turn around as I found the little drops of rain forced their way harder upon my back making it unbearable. My tired body was giving way and I shaking uncontrollably.   
Out of frustration or madness, I knew not what.  
  
Without anything to save or hold onto, my eyes closed heavily as my body swung to one side and I fell down with my arms apart.  
  
Someone still called my name as if they were so many yards off. My eyes couldn't open, but I felt my name being said over and over in some distance.  
  
As I lost unconsciousness, my last thought was, "Where could you have gone, Yuzuki?"  
  
Even when I should have thought about myself, I thought about this girl…  
**  
  
"Mino-kun?" a sweet voice said to my ear.  
  
My eyes opened to find my sister putting my hands on my knees as she helped me put on my shoes. I looked at my hands…stubby little hands.  
  
My only thought at the time as I saw her gentle expression before me was, "I want to be with my Onee-san. She is always so nice to me."  
  
Her head tilted to one side as she asked, "Mino-kun? What are you thinking about?"  
  
When I was little, I couldn't express my feelings, but I grabbed her hand and smiled. I was so shy that I couldn't even speak, but she understood me without words.  
  
If only I…  
If only I could have made her sad smile stop…  
  
The one she always gave me whenever she visited me. Love and pity blended into a single hue…  
**  
  
When I woke up two days later, I found myself in a hospital with Hibiya-san holding my hand. My head slowly registered her face, but by the touch, I knew it was no one other than her.  
  
"Hello, Minoru-kun…" she greeted me as her grip on my hand became a little bit tighter. She sighed a big sigh of relief as she let go and hugged me. "I was so worried!"  
  
"I'm sorry," I weakly answered as she pulled away.  
  
While wiping her tears of worry away with the back of her hand, she laughed as she said, "You are usually not so troublesome. But when you are, you go all out, don't you?"  
  
I tried to conjure up a smile as I heard Hideki say, "Yea! He's awake."  
  
My head turned towards the door. I saw Hideki come in with two cups of coffee and a slightly matured Chii in back of him. I think it was because she pulled her hair back since it always got in the way while she cooked. She complained about that once to me.  
  
They sat by me as Chii patted my leg with a small rub. "How is Minoru-kun?"  
  
"Okay, I guess," I replied unsteadily.  
  
After handing one cup to Hibiya-san, Hideki patted my head. Sighing, he said with a smile, "I'm just glad you weren't heavy to carry all the way to the hospital."  
  
"How did you find me?" I asked, almost ashamed at such a stupid inconvenience.  
  
"Fate," Hideki said as he took a sip of his coffee. "I got a call from Manager Hibiya while Chii and I were watching a late night movie. But Chii and I didn't know where to begin until we recognized you while running through the park."  
  
"Thank you very much," I said with a smile as I tried to pat his hand.  
  
Hideki shook his head as he got up and cupped his hand into Chii's. "Sorry, but we've got to go to work soon. But take care and we'll be back later."  
  
Hibiya-san, who was left next to me, finally turned her head to me after the other two had left and said, "Your grandmother was here also."  
  
At the mention of this, I was happy and angry at the same time. I didn't want to see her at the moment. So what if I was going to be a temperamental child right now?  
  
"And what did she say?" Only out of politeness did I utter these words without getting too upset.  
  
"She will be back in a few days while she goes on a business trip on your behalf."  
  
I nodded. "Ah."  
  
She started to yawn and I said, "I think you should go home and get some sleep."  
  
I looked out the window with the crickets already out and at her watch. Eleven o'clock, it read.  
  
She persisted, "I should be here."  
  
I shook my head. "You've already done enough. More than I could have ever asked for."  
  
"But-" Hibiya-san protested.  
  
"Please rest. And I will see you later." I said this with a smile that made her take up my offer.  
  
She got up and bowed her head. "I'll be back bright and early tomorrow, then."  
  
"Thank you…"  
  
"I hope so…" she trailed off as she got her things and walked to the door. This tone of uncertainty prevailed in the air as she took the knob of the door.  
  
"Please find her…" I begged as she silently closed the door behind her.  
And in that white hospital room, the nurse came and went. I was alone and staring at the ceiling thinking of my sister and about that dream before I came to consciousness.  
It was the time when I was only four and I was still a mute, but only to her would I even say a single word.  
  
She made me speak.  
But now, I found no words to express the depths of my mind.  
  
All my thoughts kept on circling back to Yuzuki. Where could she have gone? Did she hear what we were talking about? Maybe. But why was there oil? I had to know…  
  
Lying here was of no help to me, but my fever was giving me choice whatsoever.  
  
As I turned my head to the window of my room, I sighed. Was there no other way to get through this? And why was this so sudden?  
  
Click…  
My hospital was being opened and as I turned my head, I saw Her slip into the room cautiously. She looked outside with the pure intention of not being seen.  
  
I, who was watching her do all this, couldn't help but feel that I had already slipped into dreaming. Or better yet, was I going delirious with all the rainwater that had floated into my ears?  
  
She bowed her head as she said my name, "Minoru-sama…"  
  
Her words were like a double-edge sword. Protective, yet killing me at the same time with its purity and cruelty.  
  
"Yuzuki…" I weakly said as I got up slowly and coughed while doing so.  
  
As she came towards me, I was watching a Venus undress herself while the raincoat slipped off her figure, which revealed a sight that I wasn't accustomed to.  
She was wearing the simple, dark blue dress I had given her underneath.  
  
With all the confusion in my head, I caught her arms as she came and just hugged me. She buried her head into my hair and I felt something immediately different.  
Pushing her away a little, I held her arms. "Why? Why did you leave me?!"   
  
My hoarse and whispery voice shouted at her with my hands grabbing her arms with a firm grip. I shook my head as I looked at her with nothing else to say.  
  
My heart was dying and here she was standing in front of me…  
  
Blankly, she looked at me. "I want to be with Minoru-sama."  
  
"I don't understand what is happening to you, Yuzuki…" I pleaded. "Answer me."  
  
"Do you love me as you say you do?" she asked with much innocence. The same question I had posed to my sister so many years ago was coming back to haunt me.  
  
"You shouldn't even have to ask me."   
  
She blinked her eyes sadly, "Would you do anything I asked for?"  
  
I couldn't understand where this was leading, but my heart was beating faster and faster in apprehension.  
  
"Then let me go," she told me. "I ask you to let me go, Minoru-sama."  
I became numb…  
  
My eyes blankly blinked at her as she carefully, yet gently pushed my hands away. As she shook her head, she folded her hands in front of her. Stepping away from me, her eyes became more distressed. "I want to be the person that can be with Minoru-sama."  
  
"Yes, you are, Yuzuki…" I gently said as I feebly pushed my body to move off the bed. I got off as she shook her head more and more.   
  
"No," she quietly said. She gave me even more sorrowful eyes. "Minoru-sama, you have been kind to me, but don't you see?"  
  
"What is it, Yuzuki?" I stood there and saw a part of Yuzuki I had never seen before.  
  
For the first time in my life, I was seeing Yuzuki speak for herself and her feelings. It was amazing and yet I knew that our time was diminishing because of it.  
  
"I can't grow old with you." Oil started to come out of her eyes. "And I cannot even give you a child."   
  
Oil tainted red…  
  
I was shaking my head back and forth as I tried to get closer to her. At that moment, she came closer to me.   
  
"I can't give you anything…" With her eyes closed, she tenderly kissed me on the lips.  
  
Then, she pushed herself away as she ended, "It is painful to love someone you are useless to…"   
  
I reached out for her hair, but it was too late. I watched her leave me with my hand in mid-air still trying to catch her.  
  
"You haven't changed," I mumbled as my grip finally gave way while trying to get to the door.  
  
With my fever rising, I was too weak to run to the door and catch up with her. As I grabbed for the knob of the door, I fell to the ground helplessly. Still trying to catch the star that just wouldn't be caught.  
Click…  
And with the closing of the door, I touched the cold, tile floor.  
I felt that we had somehow traded places. She was becoming more and more 'human' while I was swayed by her actions.  
"You are my 'dake no hito'," I whispered to the impersonal, white walls of the room while my eyes closed while I was on the cold floor.  
You are my dake no hito…  
You control my fate.  
  
Tsuzuku.  
--  
Author's note: Aiya…I think that the story is going a little fast so I'll have to back track so that I may enter the grandmother once more. And what's chobits without our other characters??? Hee. Especially if Ueda-san and Sumomo are my second favorites. 


	10. Chapter 9 Sagashite iru, Doko made mo

Disclaimer: Yui doesn't own Chobits. Clamp does. Melodies of Life is from Final Fantasy 9.  
  
Forever Yours  
By miyamoto yui  
Chapter 9 - Sagashite iru, doko made mo. (Searching, wherever.)  
I was watching myself once more as if watching a clipped movie of my life. There she was in the dining room of my large mansion trying to get my younger self to settle down.  
  
Kaede Nee-chan was putting my shoes on as she laughed when I said, "I could do it myself."  
She shook her head as she patted my head. "Of course you can, Mino-kun. But let me do it for today, okay?"  
I nodded while playfully swinging my legs on the chair I was sitting on. She was kneeling on the floor with a head shaking and her hair swinging from side to side. "Do you want to be late to see the Angelic Layer match?"  
I put my hands on my lap and became instantly still with wide eyes.  
  
"Unless you don't want to go…" she teased with her eyes closed and shoulders shrugging.   
  
I shook my head. "Oh no, I don't want to miss the first match! It's HER!"  
  
At this, my sister lifted up her hand and laughed. Then, she put my shoes on my feet.  
They were the red sneakers she had gotten me.  
She lifted me out of my seat and poked my cheeks. "You really like her, don't you?"  
  
I nodded my head as I took Nee-chan's hand and headed out to the Angelic Layer tournament hall.  
  
When we got there, it wasn't Nee-chan's turn to go, so we went to the railings way at the top. Nee-chan asked me, "Do you want to go to the front? You'll see better there."  
I shook my head and pointed at the screen. "I can see her!"  
  
"And he forgets about saying hi to me," someone said in a fake angry tone.  
  
"Sai Nee-chan~!" I ran to Sai and hugged her leg because I was so short. Well, considering that she was tall too.  
"Oi, Minoru-kun." She patted my head while looking from side to side. Then, she handed me a box of Pocky.  
"Thank you!" I happily said as I hugged her leg again.  
Nee-chan pouted. "Sai, I keep on telling you not to spoil him."  
She just shrugged her shoulders. "As long as you're not mad, it's all right. Besides, aren't you one to talk?"  
Sai smirked as Nee-chan lifted up her chin a bit.  
I tore the box open as Nee-chan lifted me up and we sat on a seat by the stairway. She sat me in her lap and hugged me while pointing at the screen. Sai just shook her head, came next to us and patted Nee-chan's shoulder.  
  
"First round…In the West corner…" the announcer shouted in the microphone. "In the East corner, Angel Suzuka! Deus Kobayashi Hatoko!!!"  
  
I clapped my hands as the match began and watched attentively.   
  
To tell the truth, I didn't know what Angelic Layer was at all. I was coming home from school when I had seen a sale at the Piffle Princess but I was too little to say anything.   
Not that I was any older, but ever since I was told, "Minoru-kun, you have a sister," I was excited to meet her. They told me she was in Angelic Layer.  
So, I started to watch Angelic Layer matches on tv, but the first match I had ever seen was Suzuka's! I had missed who the Deus was and anticipated again when I would see her.  
  
I searched the internet until I found her: Kobayashi Hatoko.  
And she was only a few years older than I.  
  
You could say she was my first crush.  
  
So, when she won, I really didn't know that my Nee-chans' had known her. I think that's why Kaede Nee-chan kept on laughing at my innocence.  
When I saw her backstage, I was so frightened. There was something about looking at her face-to-face and into her eyes that was so different than watching her fight.  
  
She was just a kid like me.  
But…if she were as lonely as me, I didn't know…  
  
"Hatoko-chan?" Nee-chan smiled as she pushed me towards Kobayashi-san. "This is my little brother, Minoru-kun. He's a big fan of yours."  
  
She smiled as she held out her hand to me. "Hello, I'm Hatoko."  
"H-hi." I said as I shook her hand, but nothing more. I didn't really talk too much, except to Nee-chan.  
  
"You like Angelic Layer too?" she asked as we were walking.  
  
I nodded my head nervously while trying to keep from staring at her.  
  
"Do you have a doll yet?"   
  
I shook my head.  
  
"If you did, what would you name it?"  
  
I shrugged my shoulders.  
  
"Ah…"   
  
Then, I stammered, "I'd make one that looks like Nee-chan, but I want it to be strong like you."  
  
Nee-chan blinked her eyes. Sai blinked her eyes too with a smirk.   
  
I blushed red, almost as red as when I had first looked at Yuzuki before switching her on.  
  
"Notice that he said 'like you' and not 'like Suzuka'," Sai whispered to my sister. "You have competition."  
  
Nee-chan couldn't help but laugh as she patted my head.  
  
Hatoko laughed also as she patted my shoulders. "You're very cute."  
  
I remembered that she smiled at me, not for being politely, but really smiled at me. Hatoko was always pretty and strong to me…  
  
--  
I must have been out of it because I found myself back on my bed with even more patches from scraping myself when I fell onto the floor.   
And I could feel someone's hand on my forehead. It was a warm hand…  
  
I had wished it was hers…  
  
"Minoru-kun?" she said as I opened my blurry eyes to find that girl in front of me…  
  
The long, black hair with the signature red hat that she couldn't give up since Kindergarten. Then again, it was her trademark.  
  
"Hatoko-chan?" I blinked my eyes and immediately became red at the cheeks. "H-how…"  
  
"A-hem." Another person in the room cleared their throat purposely. As I turned my head, I found another familiar face only a few feet away from me. "Your sister would be really upset with me if she saw this."  
  
I blinked my eyes and smiled. "Oh, Sai Nee-chan."  
  
Her eyes closed a bit. "You're no different from her, aren't you?"  
  
I laughed sheepishly at the girl that my sister loved as much as she loved me. The one that took care of her even when our father got upset-  
  
"How are you doing?" Hatako asked as she squeezed my hand. Then, she lightly hit me on the hair, just scuffing it a bit. "You baka. I came in here to find that you were on the floor and not on the bed! You were heavy."  
  
"I'm sorry," I explained with a crack in my voice and a sigh. "Yuzuki was here and I couldn't stop her from leaving."  
  
Sai sighed as she shook her head. "How many times does this have to go on?"  
Hatako tried to catch her hand as Sai left the room with an upset expression.  
  
She turned to me and gave me a gentle smile. "You know how, Sai-san is…"  
  
I nodded. I couldn't blame her, though.  
Losing my sister was still something that never left us. It was a scar that embedded itself so much that it became a staple like iron in our blood.   
We died little-by-little like poison, and yet, we needed it to live at the same time.  
  
"I know," I answered with a sigh. "It's only scary when Shirahime's Deus isn't feeling _anything_."  
  
"Very, very true," Hatoko nodded her head with a slight smile.   
  
Her expression changed as she challenged me. "Why are you even here, my dear Minoru-kun?"  
  
"I was in the rain and got sick." I put my hands together for my stupidity. In a normal state of mind, I would have never done this.  
  
"So, I've heard…" she said. "But it's not that. I'm not talking about that. You don't belong in a place like this."  
  
It was then that she produced the papers in front of me. "Come on, let's go."  
  
"What?" I said with a high-pitched tone of surprise.  
  
"You're leaving right now. I can't stand you being like this," Hatoko harshly said as she pushed me up. "There's nothing wrong with you."  
  
"I'm-" I protested.  
  
"You're broken here." She patted my chest softly, where my heart was. "And only I can help you there right now because Sai-san is too upset."  
  
"What about-" I tried to point out.  
  
"We'll call her later. And I told Ms. Hibiya that I'd take care of you today, okay?" She smiled as I got dressed in the bathroom.  
  
As I washed my face, I saw my reflection. "Hatoko…hasn't changed…"  
So, there I was checking myself out of the hospital with a girl that had told me I didn't need to be there. And she was right.  
  
She even carried my backpack of stuff and walked by me. "Today, you will come with me."  
  
While walking to wherever Hatoko wanted to go, I told her about Yuzuki's visit and what was going on. She nodded as she listened attentively.  
After fifteen minutes had passed, we found ourselves in front of the Piffle Princess store. I took a big gulp.  
  
I didn't want to go there…  
Not after what happened…  
  
"Face your fear." Hatoko stood in front of me with a serious face. "You told me you wanted to be as strong as me? Or did you lie to me because you were only a little kid?"  
  
I blinked my eyes in embarrassment and shock. "You still remember that?"  
  
She shook her head with a smile. "Of course I did."  
  
Tugging on my sleeve, she slowly led me in. We went to the back of the store to see the special display they had put up years ago. It was a glass case with lights to accentuate the fine details of each display.  
  
Some were replicas, and some were the real ones themselves.  
  
I shook as I saw each while mumbling each of their names to myself,  
"Natasha…Ranga…"  
  
I stopped as I saw the replicas of Hikaru and Wizard next to one another with their backs to one another almost as if they were going to dance. Next, I stopped to touch the glass case that held Sai's Shirahime as it was years ago before she was retired…  
  
But I couldn't turn to see who was next. Wherever Sai was, my sister was sure to be next to her…  
All the voices kept on coming back to me…  
"What happened?!" people shouted as soon as Sai turned to me with a shock face while holding my sister in her arms.   
"Onee-chan?"  
  
We didn't know…  
She never told us it was so serious…  
  
"I'm fine, really." She had said over and over whenever we asked her.  
  
We believed her.   
For how could Heaven's smile lie to her most beloved?  
  
Yet, she had.  
  
Hatoko shook me to get me out of my mental chaos. "Minoru-kun! You have to see what she put!"  
  
I shook my head.  
  
"There is nothing to fear," Nee-chan's voice told me once as I remembered her wiping my tears away. "Onee-chan will always be there for you. Remember that, Minoru-kun. Always…"  
  
I began to open my eyes as Hatoko brought me to the display of Blanche. She had her arms out as if to turn and dance while leaning forward. White and as dazzling as ever.  
On a little card, it said, "To my little brother. Taking care of you wherever I am."  
  
I was holding my composure until the store radio played a song from a video game that was being re-released for the the umpteenth time, but never forgotten.  
  
I never showed this to Yuzuki, but she sang it to me when she brought me back to reality with her love and smile. This was the song that made me fall so in love with her.  
  
I started to cry while standing there in a trance as I reached out to Hatoko's hand to lend me her strength while I listened painfully:  
  
"Alone for a while I've been searching through the dark  
For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart  
To weave by picking up the pieces that remain  
Melodies of life - love's lost refrain"  
  
I knew the next line as I grabbed Hatoko and wrapped my arms around her not minding that I was weak. 'Little Minoru' they had always called me, and I had always showed people my strength. But all that time, I was so lonely.   
  
"Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why  
We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye  
And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told?  
Let them ring out loud till they unfold  
In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me  
Though you're gone, I still believe that you can call out my name  
  
A voice from the past, joining yours and mine  
Adding up the layers of harmony  
And so it goes, on and on  
Melodies of life,  
To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond  
  
So far and away, see the bird as it flies by   
Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky   
I've laid my memories and dreams upon those wings   
Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings  
  
In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me?  
Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind?  
  
A voice from the past, joining yours and mine  
Adding up the layers of harmony  
And so it goes, on and on  
Melodies of life,  
To the sky beyond the flying birds--forever and beyond  
  
If I should leave this lonely world behind  
Your voice will still remember our melody  
Now I know we'll carry on  
Melodies of life  
Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts  
As long as we remember."  
  
"Why are you scared, Minoru-kun?" Hatoko patted my back. "I told you she wanted you to see this someday. But you never wanted to come here."  
  
Nee-chan knew she was going to die…  
I didn't want to come to see the dedication as an act of defiance to her.  
I was mad at Nee-chan for lying to me…  
Seeing both my sister and Yuzuki next to one another in my mind, I said, "Yuzuki told me to let her go."  
  
That was what ran through my head all this time. I couldn't understand, yet I understood just as much.  
  
"Maybe that's what you have to do." Hatoko said as she looked at Blanche in front of us.  
  
"Why? I need her. And she needs me."  
  
"She sees herself as a shadow, Minoru-kun. The more you see her, the more you see Kaede-san."  
  
"No!" I shouted as my body shook. "I've learned to let go so long ago. I love Yuzuki and I will give up everything else if that's what it amounts to."  
  
"But like your sister, you've to understand that she'll leave you because she doesn't want you to do that." She explained. "Yuzuki's love is just that way."  
  
"I never wanted her to sacrifice anything for my sake."  
  
"Maybe someone else did," Hatoko started to say. "Herself. She's doing this for herself. To discover why would you give up everything for her."  
  
"Because she likes who I am. She doesn't look at me like her master or even a brother. She doesn't want me for money or for power…" My eyes started to pour onto her clothes with my silent sobs while hugging Hatoko closer. "She stopped my loneliness and showed me what it meant to be alive after being dead when Nee-chan died."  
  
"Since she cannot show you through words or emotions, she's showing you something else. That's the difference between your sister and Yuzuki-san. Yuzuki-san is telling you, not because she's weaker, but she is unafraid of being hurt. The most important thing is you, and for you to be hurt is the _only_ thing that would break her."  
  
I told her, "But this is worse, doesn't she know?"  
  
"No, she doesn't know that. That was one thing your sister didn't understand," she said to me as she hugged me even closer.   
  
I mumbled, "Yuzuki…"  
  
"Yuzuki is telling you something is wrong and she's not hiding it from you anymore…"  
  
It was then that I stopped crying and looked at Blanche once more.   
  
"I understand now…" I said as I held onto Hatoko's arms while still looking at Blanche.  
  
She let go of me as her confident smile came back. That meant things were the way they should be.   
  
"Then why are you still here?" She laughed as she pushed me away while wiping away a tear. "I'll take care of your bag."  
  
I began to quickly walk away from her with a loud, "Thank you, Hatoko!"  
  
She slapped her hand on her forehead as people came up to her saying, "Oh my god! It's Suzuka's Deus!!!!"  
  
I ran out into the street like a madman towards my grandmother's house.   
She wants me to find her before she runs out of time…  
  
To find her beneath  
Her smile…  
  
The true Yuzuki.  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
Author's notes: Yes, I know I'm dragging it out. I thought that I was going to make this much longer, but I guess not. If I drag it out too much, it will wear out its charm. Can I really keep an audience this long? Even I have a short attention span. Thanks for putting up with me!  
Damn, I can't help but keep crying on this chapter. * is still crying * 


	11. Chapter 10 Jishin

Disclaimer: Angelic Layer and Chobits are both by Clamp! (This goes for the last chapter too! I forgot! Gomen ne!!!)  
  
Forever yours  
By yui miyamoto  
Chapter 10 – Jishin (Self-confidence.)  
  
I looked all around me as I wheezed while pushing my palms on my knees in tiredness. "How will I get to my grandmother's? * huff, puff * My body might not be able to take it."  
  
"I'll get you there," said a voice behind me.  
  
I turned around towards the street to find Misaki beckoning me with her hand.   
"Come on, Minoru-kun!" she shouted.  
  
I slammed the car door as we skidded away with Misaki laughing. "I'm not used to stopping out of nowhere."  
She winced with her childish innocence, "I hope I don't get a ticket!"  
  
In return, I laughed with a smile, "You're always very funny, Misaki-san."  
  
She nodded her head sympathetically. "I can't help it."  
  
Then, her tone changed as she watched the road, "Where are you headed again, Kid?"  
  
"Grandmother's," I answered while folding my hands. She hadn't called me that in so long. It was her nickname for me because we used to tease one another about Angelic Layer dolls.  
  
"Ah, great! Near Oujirou's home." She smiled as she held onto the steering wheel. Then, she glanced at me. "What happened? Why do I hear you're so unhappy?"  
  
Misaki frowned. "Your sister would be so upset right now."  
  
"But-but how did you-" I stammered.  
  
She gave me a side-glance with a wink. "Oh, you know how my Angelic Layer teacher used to say for her angel to go beyond speed and sound?"  
  
"Hatoko…" I smiled with relief as I shook my head. "She really is amazing."  
  
Misaki nodded as she reached out to hold my hand. "You've pushed yourself to the limit."  
  
"Or my sister wouldn't ever forgive me," I replied with a determined face.  
It was Misaki's turn to get nostalgic. "Did I ever tell you about the first time I fought with your sister?"  
  
I shook my head.  
  
"Well," she continued, "when we first met, she said Blanche was her child. But when we fought, Blanche went into hyper mode and I was wondering why she still insisted for Blanche to fight despite all the pain and damage. Through it all, she still smiled."  
  
I looked down to my lap. "Nee-chan was always like that…"  
  
Misaki, in a serious voice, explained to me, "Your sister told me that even though Blanche was in pain, she wanted her to try her best. So, she had to push her to the limit."  
  
She then squeezed my hand. "But you don't have to fight alone. Don't think all by yourself, Minoru-kun. Ever since we all met, we are here for you. All you had to do was ask us."  
  
"Misaki-san…" I replied as I thought of Blanche in the display.   
  
She let go as my hands became fists. "Yuzuki has to know that too. That I'm always going to look for her wherever she is. I will never give up on her. Even if she might hate me for it."  
  
Misaki smiled. "Your sister taught me that you have to have the courage to hurt someone only because you care for them to be their best. I couldn't understand that before.  
But you know what I learned from Yuzuki? When we started to get to know one another, she always tried her best to be the person she wanted to grow into."  
She blinked her eyes. "Probability is great and all, but from the start, I saw that she had the will. She didn't want to reach you as a persocom, but as a person who wanted to be next to you, Minoru-kun. From her, I learned that my own doubts finally were put to an end."  
  
"Doubts?" I asked incredulously. "About what?"  
  
"Oujirou is older than I am and he is way taller. At first, I thought my feelings would never reach him because all I looked like was a little girl to him," she said as she smiled wistfully. "Then, even when he said he loved me, I didn't believe him. 'He still loved his first love, right? Isn't that what he had told me?' I had thought."  
  
Again, she glanced at me. "For a long time, that's what I was fighting inside of me. I was seeing myself against that wonderful woman he loved first. I didn't truly believe him until I saw Yuzuki and the way she looked at you."  
  
She patted my head and messed up my hair. "Yuzuki probably thinks that you're stuck on what she looks like, Minoru-kun. You have to prove to her that you love her heart, her mind, and the soul she's trying to make for herself.  
You love her so much, you could be pushing her away that way."  
  
"I…I never thought about it that way." I shook my head as I blinked my eyes in contemplation. "Why would she push me away?"  
  
"She doesn't know who she is yet," she answered. "You have to support her, no matter what it is."  
  
"Like with Hikaru," she explained as she touched the keychain of a mini Hikaru hanging on the rearview mirror. "Angel's project your feelings, until they take up a personality of their own. Then, they have develop their own heart and they listen to your voice because you are friends.  
Yuzuki is your guardian angel, but you have to let her grow. That will sometimes mean you have to let her go and breathe by herself, without you."  
  
I nodded my head. "Thank you for your advice, Misaki-san. I never thought of these things before."  
  
"I know more than anyone the pain of being away from someone that you want to be close to," Misaki said as she grinned as she patted my cheek. "Then, in the end of all my tears, I saw that I should have just said what I wanted, and shouldn't have tried to convince that things were okay.   
"Yuzuki will learn to do that. She will tell you what she really wants and not what's good for both you. And you know why? Because you have tried hard for her."  
  
I patted her hand. "Thank you…"  
  
Then, she parked the car in front of my grandmother's. As I was about come out of the car, she said, "Lean forward."  
"Yes?"  
She then blushed as she kissed my cheek. "I remember when Hatoko did this at the first AL tournament. She said, 'A gift for good luck.'"  
I blushed as I got out of the car.   
  
"Remember, nothing is impossible as long as you have the heart and will to overcome your obstacles. Even when it's against yourself."  
  
Again, I nodded my thanks. "Please say hello to Oujirou-san for me!"  
  
"I will! And if you don't try your best, I'll make you play against Wizard and your Subaru doll!" she laughed as she put the window up and left.  
  
I then pushed the intercom with unwavering eyes. "Hello, I would like to speak to my grandmother…"  
  
The gates opened and I walked in with my head up.  
  
The door was opened and one of the maids bowed while taking me to my grandmother's office. While opening the door for me, she announced, "Madam has been expecting you."  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
Author's notes: Seems that we are half way through the story! I have finally have an outline until the ending. But, I'm still trying to figure out if I want this happy or sad…  
I know the story has been nothing but angst, but I hope that it is also heart-warming. I also hope that the messages I've been trying to say are getting through. 


	12. Chapter 11 Probability

Disclaimer: Yui doesn't own Chobits or Angelic Layer.  
  
Forever Yours  
By miyamoto yui  
Part 11 – Probability and fact overturned by intensity.  
"I didn't expect anything less," I smiled to myself as I said my thoughts aloud to the maid.  
  
I nodded my head understandingly and thanked the maid. I closed the doors behind me and turned around to my grandmother.  
Grandmother, who was sitting behind her desk, nodded her head with an all-knowing smile on her lips and hands folded. "Have a seat, Minoru-kun."  
  
"No thank you, Grandmother." With a polite shake of my head, I walked up to her desk and planted my hands on the cold wood. "I will be leaving shortly."  
  
"Minoru-kun, I know what you've come for," she calmly told me as she patted my left hand with a sorrowful face.  
  
"So, please grant her to me," I answered in exasperation. "I don't want anything else if she taken away from me."  
  
With tears in my eyes, I squeezed my grandmother's cold hand. "I don't want to lose another person. It hurts so much…"  
  
At that moment, I let go as I went on my knees and bowed my head toward her. "Please give her back to me, Grandmother."  
"Minoru-kun…" The tough exterior that my grandmother gave even in emotional matters all these years was crumbling as her voice became even more grave. "I didn't want to hurt you in any way. You are my favorite grandchild. And you understand me the most, both as an adversary in business and as a person."  
  
She got up as I found her kneeling to me and hugging me. "Please don't remind me of your late father's broken hearted face…  
"Your sister had begged in this same manner before us…" she started off.  
  
I held back my breath as my eyes opened. "Onee-san?"  
  
My eyebrows twitched as my eyes wandered from side to side in confusion. Grandmother held my shoulders as we both got up. Looking into my eyes, Grandmother told me, "Before her last Angelic Layer tournament, your sister bowed like you did. She asked your father and me for permission to live with Sai."  
  
"She had?"   
  
I didn't know…  
That's how close they were…  
  
"Sai didn't know about any of this until your sister's heart failed. She was going to tell Sai after the tournament, but it was never to be." Grandmother's hands cupped shakily onto my cheeks. "I didn't want your heart to break too…with mine also…"  
  
"Then please let me know where Yuzuki is. I know she was here." I closed my eyes in great pain as I gulped and looked deeply into my grandmother's eyes. "I know she had to come here…"  
  
My grandmother shook her head as she smiled wistfully. "You must be connected by the red thread of fate…"  
She let go of my face as she said, "She was here."  
  
"Where is she?" The restlessness inside of me was taking over as I placed my hands on my grandmother's shoulders. "I have to find her before it is too late."  
  
"She came her saying, 'If there is a way to make Minoru happy without me causing him pain, please tell me.' Yuzuki knew that one day I would come to get her if she got in the way of the family."  
  
I sighed with nothing to say.  
That's why I had wanted to disown myself first…  
  
"Yuzuki came here freely to save your future, don't you see?" my grandmother tried to explain as I shook my head with a response of, "No…"  
  
"The poor child bowed her head and told me, 'He is better off without me.'" But at that moment, my grandmother's eyes became soft as she said, "But that's not true, isn't it?"  
  
She began to cry. "When a persocom thinks that the logical reason is to 'disappear' when you cause the one you love and serve pain."  
  
"Grandmother…" I sighed in bewilderment.  
  
"Tell me this is not true, Minoru-kun…" Her eyes blinked at me with tears. "Prove to me this isn't the way of the world…"  
  
She continued while placing her hands firmly onto my elbows. "You can defy it. I couldn't do it, but you can, Minoru."  
  
"I…I don't understand what's going on…" I blinked at my grandmother.  
  
For the first time, I had seen her vulnerable and weak…  
"I couldn't die off without seeing you happy," she told me. "I'm holding on while my batteries are letting me…"  
  
Batteries…?  
Wha…what is going on?  
  
My eyes opened wide. "What did you say?"  
  
Almost ashamed, my grandmother pushed her hair over her ear like a young girl with a disease of the skin. Just like Yuzuki, there was a port…  
  
"Grandmother???"   
  
"I'll tell you later when it's time."  
  
At that moment, she pushed me away. "You don't have much time, Minoru-kun. While Sai is dissuading your Yuzuki, you've got to get to her.  
"Before she goes berserk because she doesn't know who she wants to be."  
  
Grandmother stood tall again as she let her long, meshed black and white hair fall on the sides of her face once more.  
  
I nodded my head as she encouraged, "Tell her that disappearing makes the problem worse than better. And prove to me that the world is wrong when it comes to our kind. Probability isn't always the best solution."  
She then kissed me on the forehead and I turned around with my head up high.  
  
But even grandmother didn't know where Yuzuki was…  
What else could I rely on?  
  
I blinked my eyes as if concentrating in seconds while walking outside of the house. "Where would you be with Sai Nee-chan?"  
  
They could be anywhere…  
As I walked out of the front entrance, there was someone waiting for me.  
  
"Chii?" I asked as she nodded her head and motioned for me to get into Hideki's car. "I'm the only one who can help you now."  
  
--  
Author's note: Things are getting very interesting, aren't they? ^_^ 


	13. Chapter 12 Fighting the world and yours...

Disclaimer: Chobits is by Clamp. "I can never get enough" is by In Heaven.  
Forever yours  
By miyamoto yui  
  
Chapter 12 – Fighting the world and yourself.  
I got into the car as Chii nodded her head hesitantly as she smiled. Then, she began to drive while adjusting the radio station of the car.   
  
/"I can never get enough   
Never get enough  
I can never get enough   
Of you"/  
  
"Wow, you're a lifesaver," I commented as I looked at her.   
  
But my grandmother's words kept on ringing in my ears, "Before my batteries run out…Prove to me…"  
  
What was she talking about?  
Why did she look so lost? That was something even more unexpected as when she pushed back her long hair behind her ear…  
"Your grandmother has finally told you…" Chii asked me as she turned a corner. "…hasn't she?"  
  
I felt myself cringe as the song sang,  
/"Catch me now I think I'm falling  
Can't you hear my love is calling  
Catch me now I think I'm falling  
Hear my love is calling for you."/   
  
My concentrated face honestly projected my confusion. "Can you tell?"  
  
"Her time is coming soon, that's why…" she trailed off.  
  
/"It's a star walking on it  
Déjà vu and reminiscing  
And my days are running around endlessly  
Boy you got me so unknown  
If I'm coming or I'm going  
Take it slow and easy on me  
Can't you see."/  
  
How well these things were timed…  
There was the touch of innocence that always engulfed Chii's character. But after being with Hideki for some years now, she had matured in many ways.  
Somehow, I knew with certainty it was because of the trouble they had both faced, both from themselves and society.  
  
Just like Yuzuki and I…  
Before, now, and after…  
  
"How do you know all this Chii?" I asked her, fascinated at the same time as I trusted her to lead me to Yuzuki and at the fact that she was the only one who could tell me both as a Chobits and as a person.  
  
"As the prototype and a Chobits, I'm connected to each and every persocom anywhere," she said as she smiled at me with melancholy. "And in every persocom, there is a voice, Minoru. The voice is the same in each persocom when they hear it. It is because it's something hidden in me. Even I don't understand this.  
"It could be my sister, or it is me talking…or something much more than that."  
  
She blinked her eyes as she reached out to my hand.  
  
Chii continued in a gentle tone, "This 'voice' makes a persocom 'real'. And in exchange, they give up their 'life'."  
  
"I…I don't quite understand, Chii…" I said as I shook my head.  
  
"Some choose to live much longer, but they can never even begin to feel emotions." She squeezed my hand. "You know that persocoms can't feel things, ne?"  
  
I nodded my head. "It's due to the programming."  
  
"By my mother," she finished with hesitation. "But that's not true."  
  
It was then that Chii pulled into a side of the road as she put her hands on my shoulders. "Persocoms can feel, but that takes so much of their battery life. They're 'life' is taken away. And…"  
  
She squeezed my shoulders while shaking me slightly as she looked at me with her eyes remembering what had happened to her years ago. "If a persocom remembers pain, how much more painful would it be for the person that loves them? The persocom can block it out of their memory and have it erased forever, but a human cannot."  
  
At that moment, she cupped her hands on my face. "You should know this more than anyone, shouldn't you, Minoru?"  
  
"Chii…" I mumbled in amazement.  
  
"That's why I left Hideki for a while…" she sighed.  
As I looked at her pulling away and starting the engine once again, I thought about how much she had grown under Hideki's love and care. Her touch was as tender as Yuzuki's.  
That there will be a time when there will be no difference between the feelings of a persocom and a human's…  
  
Even if only in that sense.  
  
"What could I do for him once I decided?" Her hands gripped onto the steering wheel as she gave a serious look towards the road, one almost close to distress. "I would leave before he left me.   
"In suspended time, I was trapped within myself trying to figure things out. Had my sister been right in feeling so much pain for her 'dake no hito' that she wanted to erase herself from her existence? For a time, I thought she was right."  
  
I sighed while avoiding my gaze at her face.  
  
"For if Hideki did not choose me, would I wander all over again? And for what? Wasn't a 'dake no hito' the equivalent of a soulmate as humans would call it? Why must there be such a clear distinction in these things? Because we're persocoms.  
"My sister was right in disappearing if that's what it would all lead to. But Hideki called to me. In the darkness I heard his voice calling to me. It was then that I knew that I didn't have to keep on wandering aimlessly anymore. I was looking all this time, only to be found in the end."  
  
I looked out the window with life passing by in cars, buildings, people, and persocoms in a blur.   
  
"I know Hideki doesn't have it easy, Minoru," she said as kept her eyes glued to the road trying not to cry. "He always tries to brush off all the comments or I ignore the fact that there are just some cruel people out there who beat him up out of their frustration for his stupidity or the easygoing life he's had. I watch this without telling him anything.  
"And I can't tell him that there are people who treat me so badly when I go to a supermarket. I have to go to certain aisles, sometimes with persocoms themselves, so that I won't be harassed."  
  
"I know…" I nodded in understanding as I patted her shoulder. "I knew this ever since I created Yuzuki. But I can't help it. You can't control who you fall in love with, just what you do about it."  
  
There was a deep silence.  
It cut to the core deep inside of us with the questions that didn't want to cease or be even looked upon in the shadows.  
  
"Yuzuki is back in your home," Chii's soft voice cut through the silence.  
  
"What?!" I asked in astonishment. "I thought that would be the last place she would go to."  
  
I would have thought she would have gone away from me…  
Somewhere far away.  
She then sighed as she told me, "She's going to kill herself where you first created her."  
  
There was a ringing in my ears as I felt numb, unable to speak back as the words of the girl on the radio came crashing into my ears and through my body:  
/"Catch me now I think I'm falling  
Can't you heart my love is calling  
Catch me now I think I'm falling  
Hear my love is calling for you  
Calling for you  
Callling for you  
Endlessly  
Endlessly"/  
  
At the end of the song, Chii turned to me as we came to stoplight. With a determined smile, the one that drove Hideki wild with love and confidence every time he saw her, Chii cheered,   
  
"Fight."  
Yes, fight the demons inside…   
…and outside of my head.  
  
Tsuzuku…/To be continued…  
--  
Author's note: How can you have 'Chobits' without 'the Chii'? * wink * I needed her to explain what it meant to be a persocom in the first place since Chobits _is_ her story. And, I had specifically tried thinking of another way to get the story moving along with her telling something to Minoru. I wanted to originally put them running, but logically, she can't be heard if they're running towards Minoru's house, right? So, even if it seems a bit off, I hope that this was effective since this was the most plausible way to carry this out. Even if I didn't have all the characters of either AL or Chobits here, I brought out the ones that could be the most influential and significant to Minoru's 'journey' and Yuzuki's 'self-discovery'.  
  
Also, just to say that I don't know what Kaede died of because it was not specified. I'm only saying that she died of a heart failure ('cause that's how I imagined it ^^;;;;;).  
  
Oh, on another note, I had made a somewhat 'prequel' to this story. Not officially, but a while ago, I had made a side story about Sai and Kaede called 'Heaven's smile' which is under the Angelic Layer section. It's shoujo ai, but it will help in comprehending some stuff for the next chapter. 


	14. Chapter 13 paradise dream

Disclaimer: Chobits is by awesome Clamp.  
  
Forever Yours  
By miyamoto yui  
Chapter 13 – paradise dream.  
  
"Minoru?" Chii patted my head as she sighed with worry written all over her tone of voice.   
  
I just sat in my chair feeling numb with things passing all around me as if they were going in slow motion. But I knew that deep inside, it was just me.  
All this was just me, after all.  
  
I began to laugh as Chii shook her head. "No, you have to fight it!"  
  
"She is going to kill herself and I'm supposed to fight that?" I slapped my hand to my forehead. Then, I laughed even more with my self-mockery.   
  
I was the one who put her in this position.  
"Oh Minoru…" Chii began to gulp as tears began to form on her face while she drove.  
  
"I made her. I made her exist." I looked at Chii wanting to cry all over again. "Isn't cruel to make something exist when you find out all you will do is give them pain?"  
  
"Hideki believed that he could make me happy. That's all he could give me, Minoru." She began to smile through her tears. She glanced at me as she said, "That's all I wanted from him.  
"And you. You have a good family, a name and money. You have many things that many people would want. You are very lucky. Because you are kindhearted, you could even make Yuzuki with your own hands when you could have been some brat that just wanted to be waited on hand and foot."  
  
She patted my chest once more and breathed slowly. "Okay, breathe, Minoru."  
  
I just looked at her.  
  
"That's all Yuzuki wants of you. And you of all people know this. That's all you want from her." At that moment, she parked the car and patted my head. "Don't be scared of what you can't do for her.  
"Be afraid of when you don't want to. But that won't ever come, now will it?"  
  
At that moment, I hugged Chii and bowed my head. "Hideki's such a lucky man."  
  
Chii lifted up her chin and smirked playfully like the day I first met her. "Of course! He tells me everyday!"  
  
I opened the door and ran into my house.   
It was quite strange to think that all the other persocoms had that 'emotion chip' within them but they didn't want to utilize. Nor did they know how.  
  
Only ones that were well taken care of.  
Didn't I take care of them? No, I didn't love them like I did with Yuzuki…  
  
With my hands in fists, I felt my fingers press on the already open wounds as I found a secret room that only Yuzuki knew the password. Somehow, I regretted doing so as I found it had been renamed.  
  
"Shoot!" I shook my head as I closed my eyes carefully. Calming myself down, I put all the passwords that I could think of.   
  
"I'm sorry to do this…" In my panic, I ran towards Yuzuki's room and went through the drawers of her desk.   
  
"There must be a clue…" I looked at the clock as I shook with fear and a sweatdrop running down my face.   
  
It was then that I found a diary. It was as if a little girl had written these entries instead of a persocom.   
At the beginning, there was a dried orchid. On the inside cover, she had written:  
  
"Minoru-sama gave this to me. Even if he won't remember, I won't ever forget the day he said he wouldn't ever leave me.   
It was the day that I felt like a real woman. Not a persocom."  
  
"Orchid…" I mumbled as I brought the diary with me and ran towards the room in the far end of the house. Pressing the katakana symbols, my heart beat with anticipation.  
  
"If this doesn't work…"  
I sighed as I prayed that it would.  
  
The door opened and then I ran in to find it closed once more. I ran down the corridor to hear their two voices talking.  
"I should have never put that program into you." Sai harshly said. "Kaede told me in a dream that Minoru-kun would make a persocom in her image."  
  
"Sai-san…" I mumbled as I ran in a maze.  
  
I had made a personal maze so that my laboratory would be well-protected. So, I could hear their voices all over, but they couldn't hear me coming towards them.  
  
"And what will you do if you destruct now?" Sai asked with an exasperated tone.  
  
"It's better that he has less pain now than he will later." Yuzuki simply answered.  
  
"Stop! You're acting like her. Kaede…" Sai's voice was going in an out. I could tell that she was shaking her head at Yuzuki. "Don't hurt Minoru-kun like Kaede hurt me!!!"  
  
When I was getting closer to the laboratory, I could see the glass panels that I had put all around it. I shook my head.  
  
They were in their own world as my eyes opened wider.  
  
Yuzuki looked at the wire in her hands and then at Sai.  
  
"Don't Yuzuki!!!!!!" I screamed inside of my head as I ran in the maze almost getting to my destination.  
  
"She had a heart disease. And I didn't know it until it was too late. It was the same with my sister. She had the power to dream, but she didn't have the power to live. It wasn't because of choice, her body failed her." She took a hold of yuzuki's shoulders. "You have the power to live. Don't waste it."  
  
Her eyes became fierce. "Or I'll never forgive you."  
  
For the first time in her life, Yuzuki answered firmly, "It is my choice."  
  
"Yes, it is your choice, but what you have to see is that you don't understand what it means to be human…you're too weak to survive." She pushed her away. "Go ahead and leave, but Minoru should have never loved you."  
  
It was then Yuzuki's eyes became frightened. She pushed the wire away as she grabbed her head from side to side. "I don't understand. He tells me he loves me, but all I can see is that I am his sister's double. He tells me that I'm no longer that, but how can I be certain?"  
  
Then, all became quiet.   
  
I got to the final door. The password that I had never given to Yuzuki was the same as I had input into her.   
"Paradise dream!" I shouted into the system.  
  
"How will he ever know that I'm in here? Waiting. Just waiting here." Tears began to fall from her eyes.  
  
Her life draining away…  
  
The door suddenly opened and I ran past Sai to get to Yuzuki. I grabbed Yuzuki and put my arms around her waist like when I was a kid.   
In tiredness, I smiled as I whispered into her ear, "I found you, Yuzuki."  
  
She shook her head.  
  
I nodded quietly as I took her head and ran my fingers through her hair. Pressing her close to my chest, I held her tightly. "I found you, finally…"  
  
Yuzuki finally let go of the wire.   
Tap, tap.  
  
She hesitantly asked, "Minoru-sama, will you let me go when I need to?"  
  
I nodded as I said, "Go wherever you need to. Just know that I'll always be looking for you."  
  
It was then that she wrapped her arms around me. "Minoru…"  
  
I began to cry as I said, "But no matter where you go, I'll follow you, Yuzuki."  
  
As I opened my eyes to look at Sai, she turned around with a smile while walking away from me. I wanted to stop her, but I knew I would talk to her later.  
  
"Would you love me any different if I was your persocom and you were the one I served?" I shook my head as I stared into her eyes. "I don't care about what you do or what you want. Just as long as you'll let me be there next to you."  
  
As I continued to stare down at Yuzuki, she began to smile as she closed her eyes in contentment.  
  
I took a deep breath as I looked up at the white ceiling above us. I whispered to her, "We will start all over again."  
Finally, I have found you.  
But, aren't you the one who should have said that to me, Yuzuki?  
  
Take me with you,  
Wherever you may go, Yuzuki…  
Tsuzuku…  
--  
Author's note: Finally! They get to be together again! Yea~! (But that doesn't mean the angst ends. ^^;;;; Yui is just like that.)  
We're getting to the end, but we're not quite there yet. More secrets to learn and angst heading your way! ^_^v 


	15. Chapter 14 Still so far away…

Disclaimer: Chobits belongs to Clamp.  
  
Forever Yours  
By miyamoto yui  
  
Chapter 14 - Still so far away...  
  
When Yuzuki and I got back to the surface level of the house, it was already late in the evening. I didn't bother to eat dinner and the other persocoms were already inside each of their own rooms.   
As Yuzuki walked over to her own, when she was about to leave me, I took her hand by a nervous impulse.   
  
Actually, I didn't want to let go of her. I still felt that she would leave me again if I let her. Finally, I had to let go, though and as I did so, I smiled tiredly, "We'll talk about this in the morning then. I think we've both had a rough week."  
  
As I was about to turn around, she was in front of me with a nod as she gently gripped onto my hand. "Can I sleep with you tonight?"  
  
My eyes fluttered, but I nodded all the same. We walked silently to my bedroom and I sat upon my bed. As I sighed, Yuzuki asked, "Can I change my clothes too?"  
  
I tilted my head and shrugged my shoulder. "Okay, if you want."  
  
I turned to my drawers and pulled out a white shirt and shorts to sleep with. It was weird because for all these years, she had not changed unless it was for an outing and certainly not at home or for going to bed.  
It would be too much trouble, wouldn't it? Oh well, that's what she wanted.  
  
She looked at it, and then at me, in strange amusement. Yuzuki held out the clothes in front of her.  
  
"From today, you'll staying in this bedroom with me," I simply wanted to say with my hands folded. "Is that okay with you, Yuzuki?"  
  
Instead, I stared at her with nothing to say. We didn't know what to do.  
There were too many things to be said, and yet important as they seemed, they were still weightless. There was no substance to draw them from because they were questions that could not have a simple answer, nor a complete one.  
  
With her own hands folded with the shirt in between, she nodded. Then, she smiled. While looking up, she held out the shirt to me. "You have to hold this for me."  
  
As I was about to turn around, she tenderly touched my shoulder as she stood before me. "No, you have to really look at me, Minoru-sa-"  
  
"Minoru is fine, my dear." I said to her as she nodded her head.  
  
"Minoru, you have to look at me," she said to me with serious eyes.  
  
I blushed at her with my mouth slightly open in shock.  
  
"While I was gone, I went all around the city trying to find what made a human a human. What made a woman the way she is?" She looked away for a moment in embarrassment. "I went to the library, I searched the internet, I watched people, but there was no answer for my question. I needed to prove to you that I wanted to be real too."  
  
"But you-" I started to interrupt, but she placed her finger on my lips. She said, "I know. These things shouldn't have mattered at all. I didn't know that until you told me, 'I found you.'"  
  
"I may be an illusion made by your hands, but you let me grow." For a rare instant in time, I saw Yuzuki smile without the nervousness or the worry I was accustomed to seeing.   
  
At that moment, while I was looking at her, she undid her sash from behind and unbuttoned her dress.  
  
"Yuzuki..." I trailed off, in awe.   
  
I knew her body well for I had designed it, but it felt like it was the first time I had seen it.  
  
In embarrassment, I turned away from her while blushing profusely.   
  
How much she had matured in such a short amount of time...  
  
She caught my head between her hands and turned my head to face her naked body. She then let go of my face and held out her hands to me.   
  
"This is me." Yuzuki began to cry. "I am still a persocom, no matter how I tried."  
  
Yuzuki's tears fell, and this time, they were clear and white.  
  
Oh Yuzuki...  
Trying so hard to be what she wanted but couldn't.  
  
You are so much a human than you'd ever begin to realize...  
  
I took her hands and began to kiss them. "I made you with all my heart and my soul. That's all that I see. Not a human, nor a persocom."  
  
As I wrapped the white shirt around her, I began to dress her while kissing her mouth. She tried to pull back. "But isn't this only for-"  
  
I shook my head. "Chii told me you can feel to the fullest extent. Only, your battery will be lost."  
  
At that moment, I held back. A cold jolt went through my body as I let her go.   
She'll lose more of her life...  
  
I didn't want that happening.   
Not more than it already has...  
  
"That's all right, Minoru" she whispered lovingly as she wrapped her arms around me as if she read my thoughts. Then, she kissed me back.  
  
Is this wrong that I want to make love to something that isn't a human or persocom to me? Was I ever wrong to bring her so much pain and making her die the more she could feel?  
  
I kissed her forehead and then her cheek. Then, her eyes blinked at me as she pulled me close to kiss her again as my worried eyes glazed over her face. "Tell me that this is all right. That the way we live, love, and die is all right, Yuzuki..." I whispered into her ear.  
  
"Ee..." she said as she smiled at me.  
  
My sorrow and my fears left me for a moment as I kissed her neck and she turned to one side with her eyes closed while holding onto me. Her head slightly shifted as she tightly held my hands while I kissed her chest...  
  
Again, I kissed her lips as she looked up at me with a tired smile on her face. With my face next to her, I wrapped my left arm around her bare stomach while pulling the covers over us.  
We looked at one another and I felt like we were children only clinging to one another.  
  
"I love you," I whispered to her as her eyes closed to go into sleep mode.  
  
That was all I could say, but it wasn't enough. For humans, this was supposed to be the way you showed someone you loved them, whether or not it was justified. This union of mind, body and soul...  
  
But, we couldn't. It wasn't possible in our case...  
  
I ran my fingers through her hair as I stared at her smiling serenely while lying next to me.  
  
This wasn't enough to show her that every part of me ached for her.  
  
How can I ever show you, Yuzuki?  
There was no answer, but the sound of the wind outside of my window trying to gently force its way into my room with its coldness.  
  
Tsuzuku...  
--  
Author's note: I know I put a little bit of detail into this very short chapter, but I wanted to prolong them being together. Actually, I made some changes from the draft I had written also.  
I just really wanted to capture the feel of them coming to that mutual understanding with as little words a possible. This is a strange chapter, but I felt that I couldn't leave this part alone because sexuality is such a large issue in society, and especially in Chobits. 


	16. Chapter 15 My selfishness, your eyes loo...

Disclaimer: Yui doesn't own Chobits, but she does own the lyrics in the song below. Sakuma Ryuichi is Murakami-sama's creation from Gravitation.  
  
Forever Yours  
  
By miyamoto yui  
  
Chapter 15 – My selfishness, your eyes looking at me.  
  
As the sunlight hit my face, I took my arm away from my head and blinked my eyes. With my other arm still on Yuzuki, I looked at the alarm.   
  
"I have to get ready for school…" I mumbled sleepily to myself as I looked at Yuzuki, who was still on standby mode.  
  
I didn't move, though.  
  
I may have been running around the town, but I was still sick. So, instead, I found myself voluntarily missing school while I turned over to look at Yuzuki. Placing my head next to hers, I pulled her closer towards me.  
  
"I'm sorry," I whispered to her out of guilt.  
  
She sure was sleeping for a long time, and that was because I didn't figure things out earlier. I was cutting her life gradually.  
  
I sighed as I closed my eyes painfully.  
  
What was I going to do now? What were going to do?  
  
I wanted us to sleep in the same bedroom and let her live as any woman…  
  
Most of all, I wanted her to do as she pleased.  
  
Was that wise, though?  
  
I wasn't scared that she would wander off or anything of that sort.  
  
I was just scared of the changes that would have to take place, and the burdens we would have to face.  
  
They were going to come back in full force.  
  
In this room…  
  
It held many secrets.  
  
It was the only place where we weren't touched by the world and their cruelties…  
  
…and yet it was same world that had let us come into existence with one another.  
  
Hours later, I stirred when I found Yuzuki touching my cheek gently. As she took her hand away, she nervously said, "I'm sorry I woke you up, Minoru."  
  
I comforted her as I pushed the stray hair out of her face. "No, that's fine."  
  
Then, as she got up, her eyebrows touched one another. "I have to go to the market today and-"  
  
"Cancel all that for today," I told her.  
  
"But…" she said with hesitation.  
  
I pulled her and made her fall onto the bed with her long hair falling carelessly around me. Wrapping my arms around her, I kissed her cheek with my eyes closed. Smelling her hair, I said, "For today, let's just stay like this."  
  
I looked for you for days while you were searching for yourself.  
  
Let me keep you as long as I can with me…  
  
"Yes," she slowly said while patting my arms and leaning her body against my chest. The tenseness lightened as we looked at different things around the room.  
  
Finally, I said, "From now on, I want you to stay here. Is that all right with you, Yuzuki?"  
  
She shook her head and smiled gently. "I would like that."  
  
"Do as you please with the house, and if you need to buy any clothing, just charge it."  
  
"Oh, I couldn't do that, Minoru…" she shook her head. "That is more than enough."  
  
"No, you aren't just a persocom working here and taking care of me." I held her tighter. "You are my dake no hito."  
  
At this, we both became silent.  
  
If someone had asked me years ago where I would be now, I wouldn't have said this. I would not have said that I tried to show affection to a woman I had created because I was so lonely that I was going to go insane.  
  
"You're always too kind to me…" she trailed off as she gripped my arm tighter.  
  
But she was wrong.  
  
I had been so cruel. For if I had been kind, I would have never been selfish…  
  
To you or my sister…  
  
It was strange at first sleeping next to Yuzuki for the first few nights because I wasn't used to being with someone, but soon, it wasn't so strange.  
  
During those days, my friends came to cheer us on, and they were glad that things had worked out.   
  
Well that was all right in the house, but outside of those walls, it was scary to fight against so many people. To fight against yourself was the worst of it.  
  
I went back into class with my class half-caring and polite, but with some looking at me bitterly. I had not known what was going on until I had heard from one of the girls named Maria telling me that there was a girl who liked me.  
  
Do not think me egotistical, but I had gone through this type of thing before. I didn't deny that there were people who brought me to some part of campus to tell me they liked me. In turn, I tried to be as polite as possible to answer that I was not interested.  
  
There was one who had asked me, "Is it true you love a machine? Are robotic girls so much better?"  
  
The intricacies were like drops of water falling from the sky. They merged, they grew apart, they didn't make any type of logic reasonable.  
  
I shook my head trying not to get upset at the whole situation. Ueda-san and Yumi-san had told me of their own story, but it wasn't something I could explain to this girl.  
  
Her question wasn't without cause. I knew she was smart.  
  
Whether or not she was trying to really provoke an answer from me, I didn't know at that moment. But when I looked at her eyes, she was truly sincere.  
  
I answered her like this, "There was someone I loved who died. Until now, I am not over that."  
  
She was satisfied with this answer and I was glad. Simplistic as it was, I wouldn't have been able to tell her that Yuzuki was the image of my dead sister. At first, she had my sister's mannerisms, but then I grew to see them separately, but Yuzuki couldn't understand that.  
  
I fell in love with her knowing that I'd face this question someday.  
  
It wasn't about who was better. It was about feelings that couldn't be explained. Some things were just left to no explanation.  
  
The 'girl' who liked me was not from my school, but Maria had told me she had come to visit me while I had been absent. Around campus, it had become a big rumor.  
  
Information mongers are like vultures. They pick you dry…  
  
I thanked her for telling me, for one of the few girls who didn't resent me, she still treated me well because she was my friend. Not because I was 'Kokubunji', the child prodigy that I was reputed to be.  
  
Someone that they envied, yet they didn't know how much I envied them.  
  
They had more freedom than me.  
  
----  
  
That day, I sighed as I opened my shoe cubby to find a formal letter of invitation within it. I thought it was strange, but I stuck into my schoolbag to look at it later.  
  
As I left the front entrance, I stopped walking as I saw Yuzuki standing in front of me with a smile. Without any prompting, she turned around slowly. "How do you like it, Minoru?"  
  
It was simple, dark lavender dress that was sleeveless, but her hair was over her shoulders, so you couldn't really tell unless you looked closely. It was about knee-length and she wore these black books that were just past her ankle.  
  
"So, you took my suggestion…" I trailed off as I gulped.  
  
I swear, I couldn't move.  
  
Even more beautiful…  
  
"I did as you said and I picked this," she told me as I began to walk beside her while she folded her hands shyly. "It was hard to do."  
  
"Why?" I asked as I tried to keep walking with her without acting my age, like an embarrassed teenage boy.  
  
That didn't help though. I tripped somewhat.  
  
"The women could not figure out what I was trying to do," Yuzuki answered a little flustered and embarrassed. "I guess many people are not used to persocoms wandering by themselves."  
  
Persocom…  
  
It was in the back of her mind…  
  
"Let's go out," I suddenly suggested as I took her hand while we walked around town.  
  
People looked at us very funny. Yes, there were some people who were friends with their persocoms and some became so involved with them that they fell in love with them. I was among the latter, but I think they're looking at our hands.  
  
They're interlocked and they're confused on who or what Yuzuki was: Human or persocom?  
  
I couldn't help but smile to myself.  
  
You make your own definition.  
  
Yuzuki then stopped in front of a library and pointed at it. "That's where I went," she announced with a tone of accomplishment and mixed defeat.   
  
I nodded at her with a contemplative face. "How did you end up here? Why did you even want to go to a library?"  
  
"It's different from searching in the Internet," she simply answered while looking at the building.   
  
I shook my head and smiled as we walked and found ourselves going into a familiar café called Dukylon. (Well, one of many franchises.) Pulling her to go upstairs, we ended up sitting in nice corner that overlooked the busy street we had just been passing. Folding our arms on top of the table, we both looked out onto the street as the city was dimming and lampposts were beginning to light up.  
  
Everything seemed new now even though I had done this a million times. I donn't ever recall bringing Yuzuki here, but that's probably because I always ran away to this particular corner. Watching life as it passed me by from a large glass pane, but not wanting to really touch anyone or anything when things got a little confusing.  
  
"Minoru?"   
  
Yuzuki's voice interrupted my thoughts and I glanced at her. "Yes?"  
  
"Have you been here before?" she asked as she tilted her head at me while the bustling of the café and its background music seemed to really fade into a distance.  
  
I gave her a half-surprised expression while my eyes wouldn't quite look at her. "Yes."  
  
Silence.  
  
"In fact, many times before," I continued while uncrossing my arms and folding my hands and staring back at the busy street. I leaned my chin on top of my hands.  
  
"Oh…" Yuzuki replied while one waitress came and took my order.  
  
When the waitress went away, I told her why I came here. "My father used to bring me here. Sometimes, it was my mother. Then, it was my sister."   
  
I sighed. "When they were no longer taking me here, I came here by myself. It was one of few places that people knew I loved to go to. I watched this same street when my sister died. I watched it when I was making you. I watched it when I made you.  
  
After you came, I didn't come here so much. There was someone who was waiting for me at home. I didn't have to really runaway anymore."  
  
She sat silently in her place as I felt her stare upon me.  
  
"It amazes me that I have been coming here since I was two, and yet, it seems that nothing changes when I look down from this corner of this café. I'm the only one who's grown." Again, I placed my eyes on her. "Isn't that weird?"  
  
She shook her head. "No, not really."  
  
We were silent again as we heard,  
  
"…We become entangled in our own demise  
  
It becomes something convoluted  
  
I want to make love to you  
  
But you belong to someone else.  
  
I just can't stop this feeling deep inside  
  
You're driving me insane  
  
I want to kiss you so hard  
  
Until you cannot breathe."  
  
"It's not so weird because I know how that glass pane feels," she told me while her eyes diverted themselves away from my direction.  
  
I questioned with a confused tone, "Glass pane?"  
  
"You've been looking out of it all this time. But look at me, Minoru." She sighed as she pulled her arms off the table and folded her hands on her lap calmly. "I've been looking at you the same way all these years."  
  
Finally, she said, "I've watched you grow and yet…"  
  
She pulled on her dress and watched my eyes once again. "…I will always stay like this."  
  
My drink came and I took a sip of it.  
  
At that moment, we heard thunder and the sky began to cry.   
  
Sakuma Ryuichi's voice continued to sing through the speakers,  
  
"If you knew what my love truly was  
  
I'd take your lips and you wouldn't talk  
  
I'd be so close to you  
  
You'd feel the beating of my broken heart  
  
But that can never be  
  
The distance is too great  
  
I'll never reach you.  
  
'Til you can't see anything else  
  
(If I kept wandering.)  
  
'Til you see only me  
  
(If I kept singing.)  
  
My heart is crumbling  
  
(You'll forget about me.)  
  
I'm finding myself in the same vicious cycle.  
  
'Til you can't see anything else  
  
(You're tearing me apart.)  
  
'Til you see only me  
  
(How can you make me live with you?)  
  
My heart is crumbling  
  
(How can you make me live without you?)  
  
Why do I want to love you badly when it's useless?  
  
[instrumental]  
  
And like a fool, I'll go  
  
Searching endlessly  
  
For you…  
  
…even if you're just right there.  
  
Who are you?  
  
'Til you can't see anything else  
  
(I'll take your eyes.)  
  
'Til you see only me  
  
(I'll poison your mind.)  
  
My heart is crumbling  
  
(Can't take it anymore)  
  
A dangerous obsession that can't be seen.  
  
'Til you can't see anything else  
  
(If I kept wandering.)  
  
'Til you see only me  
  
(If I kept singing.)  
  
My heart is crumbling  
  
(You'll forget about me.)  
  
I'm finding myself in the same vicious cycle.  
  
'Til you can't see anything else  
  
(You're tearing me apart.)  
  
'Til you see only me  
  
(How can you make me live with you?)  
  
My heart is crumbling  
  
(How can you make me live without you?)  
  
Why do I want to love you badly when it's useless?  
  
'Til you can't see anything else  
  
'Til you see only me  
  
My heart is crumbling  
  
'Til you can't see anything else  
  
'Til you see only me   
  
My heart is crumbling  
  
Just one more night."  
  
When I finished my drink, I paid for it, and we left the café. While taking out an umbrella from my bag, I held it over us as she grabbed my hand tightly.   
  
As we were going home, I told her the only thing I could, "Don't worry about it."  
  
"You're the one who's more worried over this," she countered as we passed by many homes instead of taking a taxi home.  
  
"Yes, I know."  
  
"What do you fear, Minoru?"   
  
Tap, tap, splash, splash.  
  
The tapping of her shoes on the pavement distracted me.  
  
"I…"  
  
What did I fear more than losing you, Yuzuki?   
  
This was the expression I gave her and she looked at me while stopping in front of me but still holding my hand.  
  
As I looked into her eyes and held the umbrella with the pitter pattering of the rain on the pavement, I found myself answering,  
  
"I feared you would one day realize that you hated me."  
  
Tsuzuku…  
  
--  
  
Author's note: Yea~! Another chapter! I actually liked the detail in this one. ^_^ 


	17. Chapter 16 kimi wa soba ni iru kara

Disclaimer: Chobits is owned by Clamp. Yuzuki and Minoru are a special couple to me and so I share this fic with you.  
  
Forever yours  
  
By miyamoto yui  
  
Chapter 16 - kimi wa soba ni iru.kara. (Because you're with me.)  
  
She blinked her eyes at me as she let go of my hand. Her hands cupped my face as she closed her eyes to tiptoe and kiss me on the forehead. Still looking into my eyes, she shook her head.  
  
"I'm like that glass pane, remember?" She tilted her head at me as the rain became more and more violent around us. People walked by, but I could only feel their presence lightly around Yuzuki and me.  
  
"Through wind, sunshine, rain, and snow," she continued as she shook her head at me while her hands shook. "I will be here watching you."  
  
"How could I always be sure of that?" I blurted out as she still held my face.  
  
"I can't." She then tiptoed again and leaned her hands on my chest for support as she sang into my ear,  
  
"Wish I could prove I love you  
  
But does that mean I have to walk on water?  
  
When we are older you'll understand  
  
It's enough when I say so  
  
And maybe some things are that simple…"  
  
When she looked up into my face once more, I looked down at her with soft eyes.  
  
"Believe me, Minoru," she said as she took the umbrella from my hand.   
  
With a bright smile, she took my hand and we ran all the way home.   
  
We came home soaking wet but as we went to our bedroom, I was going to take a shower, but Yuzuki just stood in front of me and took off my shirt. As she got a towel, she patted my arms and chest while my wet hair dripped on the carpet.  
  
I took another towel and unzipped her dress as I dried her off also. As I began to rub the towel on her wet hair, I began to kiss her also.  
  
"I thought you would hate me for all I've done," I told her as I wiped her hair.  
  
She answered, "And I've thought all this time that there would come a time when you wouldn't need me anymore."  
  
In silence, we changed our clothing and went downstairs so that I could eat dinner. Yuzuki served me dinner and then she sat down across me.   
  
She took out something from her pocket and sighed as she handed it to me. "I cut this out because I think you need to read this."  
  
I gave her a curious look as I took the folded paper from her hand. I didn't like the way she was looking at me, so I just put the napkin over my lap and unfolded piece of paper.   
  
When I read what it said, my lips became thin and my eyes became more critical of the newspaper article. After reading it, I took a deep breath and then I handed it back to Yuzuki. With a grave, yet polite tone, I asked her, "Yuzuki, please search the internet immediately and find whomever wrote this…this…damn, there isn't even a word for this!"  
  
Yuzuki just patted my hand and nodded her head. "Don't get too worked up over it. That's what they want you to do."  
  
I shook my head.   
  
Leaning to one side with my hand over mouth while looking from side to side and contemplating on what to do, I had lost my appetite and I was fired up as hell.   
  
We were a silent for a while as she searched. I began to eat a little bit of the food, but since I couldn't anymore, I just stopped.  
  
Unable to take it anymore, I just blinked blankly, still feeling very pissed off by the article. Just thinking about it made my blood boil.  
  
"My business is my business! I've done what I've needed to do and with perfection, no less!" I got up and shook my head. "They have absolutely no right to say this!"   
  
Yuzuki then stopped searching and came to me. "Calm down, Minoru."  
  
I sighed as I said, "I'm going to call my grandmother."  
  
She then hugged me. "Don't waste your anger on someone who doesn't deserve it."  
  
I shook my head again as she let go of me. "Oh, that's where you're wrong, my dear. He or she will hear from me really soon. I suggest they leave the planet because I'll hunt them down."  
  
At that moment, she laughed.   
  
I looked at her in disbelief. "I'm ticked off as hell and you're laughing?"  
  
Her head went up and down. "I'm…I'm sorry…but you're kind of cute. I never see you mad."  
  
I sighed and my anger sort of dissipated with her laughter. I tilted my head and poked her nose. "I know I didn't make you with magic, but you seem to have a lot of it."  
  
She smiled at me sweetly. "Now you can talk to your grandmother calmly."  
  
I then went to my office and made the phone call. Sitting on my chair with the headset on, I resisted looking online and get upset all over again.  
  
Ring…Ring…  
  
"Good evening, Kokubunji residence?"  
  
"Good evening. This is Minoru. May I please speak to my grandmother?"  
  
"Yes, certainly," said one of the maid persocoms.  
  
She then got on the phone and answered, "Hello, Minoru."  
  
"Hello, Grandmother," I greeted back.  
  
"The article," she immediately said to the phone.   
  
Immediately, my blood began to boil. "Exactly."  
  
She sighed. "These things happen, but I can't possibly imagine who could have written this."  
  
"I'm trying to have Yuzuki look up whomever wrote this. Right now, I can't find any information except that it's from that newspaper. I can't believe that it says 'Anonymous' to protect the writer. Have you ever heard of this type of thing?"  
  
"Minoru, these are things you are going to face in the future. And this will be smaller than what you have ahead of you."   
  
"I understand, but it still gets me annoyed." I gulped while sighing into the speaker. "I only read it once, but I can't believe they said that. 'The heir of the Kokubunji company, why is his credibility questioned now? According to these statistics and some reliable sources, some investors are thinking of pulling back their support due to the fact the heir may be having many personal problems.'" Then, I continued, "And then someone had to say that if I can't even distinguish between a human and a persocom, then I can't be trusted with this business or his money."  
  
"As my grandson, I have never doubted whatever you've chosen. I may have urged you otherwise on certain occasions, but I have a reason for that and I will tell you when it's time. Tomorrow, I will be having an emergency board meeting to strategize everything. This part of the problem is mine right now, not yours. You will deal with your end and I wish you support in whatever you decide on."   
  
"Yes, Grandmother. Thank you very much." I smiled into the phone.  
  
"Oh, and one more thing." She had that tone in which she was going to kill everything in her path. "No one says this about my grandson and lives."  
  
"I know." I laughed at that statement. "And yet, you're the one who always tells me never to get emotionally involved when it comes to business because it clouds your judgment."  
  
"Oh, I'm always not emotionally involved." She laughed into the phone. "Just that this time's different. Like with you."  
  
I smirked and then we said good night to one another.  
  
When I went to bed that night, I sighed as I looked out the window. Yuzuki put her arm over mine and intertwined our fingers. Snuggling next to me, she whispered to my ear, "I don't want you to get hurt more and more. You can't fight the world all by yourself, Minoru. That's just how it is."  
  
"No, it can't be that way," I stubbornly replied back.  
  
She squeezed my hand harder, but she couldn't find anything else to say as she went into standby mode.  
  
I then whispered to the darkness while pulling her hand to my face and kissing it as if I were praying, "I can, Yuzuki. I can because you're with me."  
  
Tsuzuku…  
  
--  
  
Author's note: Whoa, I didn't know it had been almost a full two months since I touched this! Hounto ni gomenasai! But, I've been having a major writer's block. That's why I always have a variety of stuff going on at the same time to cover that. * sweatdrop *  
  
This fic is hard to write for. Well, every story with any author is. I'm just saying that my problem for these past few months was time. But more than that, it's this whole concept of having Minoru falling Yuzuki. There are social views, mental perceptions, morals, physical constraints, and so many other problems that they need to overcome. Even if it's brief, I wanted to touch upon those things, but not deviating from the focus that Minoru had to fight with himself, convince Yuzuki to stay with him, and now they have to support one another because they know what the other is thinking. Finally, they've come to a mutual understanding that the didn't truly have in the beginning of the fic.  
  
I know this is very long, but my main purpose for doing this for every fic is to leave an image in your mind as the reader of this fic. It comes out as cliffhangers, but I don't intentionally mean, "Oh, you have to read this fic to find out." I hoped you would continue to read because of the drive to learn more. 


End file.
